Gratitude

Passages

Every passage tagged with this emotion in the Vela corpus. Search the body text, narrow by source or register, click through to a book’s profile to see how the passage sits with the rest of the work.

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• From From Shame to Sin: The Christian Transformation of Sexual Morality in Late Antiquity (2013)

  Ac know ledg ments I would like to express my gratitude to the many friends, teachers, and colleagues who have contributed to the completion of this book. Over the years, generous audiences at Harvard University, Dumbarton Oaks, Cambridge University, the University of Missouri, Prince ton University, and the Society of Biblical Literature have heard parts of this argument and provided valuable feedback. My friends Scott Johnson and Greg Smith have been continuous sources of ideas and inspiration. Christian Laes has always shared his work and his ideas, much to my benefi t. I am eternally in the debt of my teachers, Rufus Fears, Michael McCormick, and Christopher Jones, all of whom will recognize, I hope, their infl uence in what ever is valuable in this book. In numerous ways my alma mater and employer, the University of Oklahoma, has made this book possible. Audiences in Classics, Judaic Studies, and Modern Languages and Literature have listened to various parts of the book and off ered stimulating conversation. I would like to thank Jordan Shuart and Jill Chance for very capable research assistance and the Honors College for enabling such assistance. Th e staff at Bizzell Library— especially in circulation and interlibrary loan— have been astonishingly generous with a diffi cult patron. My Department and its chairman, Sam Huskey, have off ered unwavering support, as has the entire  AC K N OW L E D G M E N T S administration, most of all President David Boren. To my friends who make the University of Oklahoma an intellectually lively place, especially on Fridays, I am grateful— Kevin Butterfi eld, Rangar Cline, Don Maletz, Jason Houston, Justin Wert, Luis Cortest, David Anderson, Kermyt Anderson, Jonathan Havercroft, Erik Braun, David Chappell, Eric Lomazoff , Amber Rose, Janet Ward, Dustin Gish, Jane Wickersham, David Wrobel, and Andrew Porwancher. It has been a plea sure working with Sharmila Sen and the staff of Harvard University Press. I am grateful to the anonymous reader who made a number of invaluable suggestions. Above all, I would like to express my gratitude to Glen Bowersock, whose thoughtful guidance has made this a much better book; I have learned much from him about late antiquity in general and literature in par tic u lar. It is an honor to be included in the Revealing Antiquity series. Of course, all remaining infelicities and errors are my own stubborn fault. Lastly, I thank my family for their continuous support. Mom, Haley, and Lance are always there for me. My daughter Sylvie is perfect, and she has taught me so much already. Th e book is dedicated to my amazing wife Michelle, to; kavllo~ oujk ajnqrwvpinon ajlla; qeiòn. Without her love and support it could never have been written. Index Achilles Tatius, 9– 10, 19– 23, 37– 38, 44, 51, Apologetic literature, 13, 83, 100– 107, 52– 53, 58, 70– 71, 77– 79, 80, 82, 99, 107, 117– 118, 121, 127, 135– 136, 176, 113– 114, 123– 125, 166, 182, 197,

• From Combating Cult Mind Control: The Guide to Protection, Rescue and Recovery from Destructive Cults (1988)

  Thanks to Mike White and Ghost River Images for helping to put the book together and publishing help. Special thanks to Sue Hall for PR assistance, and to Terri VandeVegte, Elise Hirschorn and Jefferson Hawkins who helped me proofread the galleys of this book. Thanks to James Elliott, P.I., who read the original Combatting Cult Mind Control book years ago and asked me to fly to California to help with the issue of human trafficking. He also introduced me to Carissa Phelps, who brought me out to assist with two trainings done by Runaway Girl for over 600 law enforcement personnel. At those trainings in the summer of 2013, I became acquainted with Rachel Thomas, D’lita Miller, and many other wonderful sex trafficking survivor/mentors. That meeting evolved into my first workshop for Lisa Goldblatt Grace and the wonderful people at My Life, My Choice, which now uses my work to help human trafficking survivors. Thanks, too, to ICSA, the International Cultic Studies Association, for which I put together a panel on the theme of trafficking as a commercial cult phenomenon. At the ICSA meeting in Washington, D.C., Christina Meyer, Rachel Thomas, Christine Marie Katas, and I met Christina Arnold, a Children of God survivor and the founder of Prevent Human Trafficking. Rachel Thomas, Carissa Phelps, D’lita Miller and I created Ending the Game, a state of the art curriculum for helping trafficking survivors understand mind control and strategies for reclaiming their power. Thanks to Janet Heimlich and the Child Friendly Faith Project. I am proud to be on CFFP’s board of advisors. The organization works to ensure that children have medical treatment, are protected from pedophiles, and are not corporally punished. This work is crucially important. Deep thanks to all of CFFP’s wonderful board members. A special shout-out to Zainab Al Suwaij, president of the American Islamic Congress, for her pioneering work in supporting women’s and children’s rights, and in promoting peaceful, collaborative Islam. Masoud Banisadr gets special praise for his intelligence, humility and courage to educate the world about terrorist groups as mind control cults. Many other people have helped me substantially along the way, providing me with information, insight, and editorial comments. So I would also like to thank James and Marcia Rudin, Bob, Barbara and their son Paul Grosswald, Dave Spector, Pascal Zivi, Arnold Markowitz, Bernhard Trenkle, Michael Langone, Rod and Linda Dubrow-Marshall, Joe Szimhart, Sue Hall, Marc and Cora Latham, Bo Juel Jensen, Lee Marsh, Mickey Hudson, Lee Elder, Paul Grundy, and John Hoyle and all the people at AAWA, Advocates for Awareness of Watchtower Abuse. Special thanks to Randy Watters of Free Minds, who was the first former elder of the Watchtower who contacted me, educated me, and supported me through the decades. To friends, supporters, and heroes who are no longer alive—Herb Rosedale, Bob Minton, Denise Brennan, Milton H. Erickson, M.D., Margaret Singer, Ph.D., Louis Jolyon West, M.D., Dr. John Clark, and Carol Turnbull—thank you for all your support and contributions.

• From Tropic of Capricorn (1934)

  Nobody can estimate the results of a good deed, of a kind word. I was swamped with gratitude, with good wishes, with invitations, with pathetic, tender little gifts. If I had had real power instead of being the fifth wheel on a wagon, God knows what I might not have accomplished. I could have used the Cosmodemonic Telegraph Company of North America as a base to bring all humanity to God; I could have transformed North and South America alike, and the Dominion of Canada too. I had the secret in my hand: it was to be generous, to be kind, to be patient. I did the work of five men. I hardly slept for three years. I didn’t own a whole shirt and often I was so ashamed of borrowing from my wife, or robbing the kid’s bank, that to get the carfare to go to work in the morning I would swindle the blind newspaperman at the subway station. I owed so much money all around that if I were to work for twenty years I would not have been able to pay it back. I took from those who had and I gave to those who needed, and it was the right thing to do, and I would do it all over again if I were in the same position. I even accomplished the miracle of stopping the crazy turnover, something that nobody had dared to hope for. Instead of supporting my efforts they undermined me. According to the logic of the higher-ups the turnover had ceased because the wages were too high. So they cut the wages. It was like kicking the bottom out of a bucket. The whole edifice tumbled, collapsed on my hands. And, just as though nothing had happened they insisted that the gaps be plugged up immediately. To soften the blow a bit they intimated that I might even increase the percentage of Jews, I might take on a cripple now and then, if he were capable, I might do this and that, all of which they had informed me previously was against the code. I was so furious that I took on anything and everything; I would have taken on broncos and gorillas if I could have imbued them with the modicum of intelligence which was necessary to deliver messages. A few days previously there had been only five or six vacancies at closing time. Now there were three hundred, four hundred, five hundred—they were running out like sand. It was marvelous. I sat there and without asking a question I took them on in carload lots—niggers, Jews, paralytics, cripples, ex-convicts, whores, maniacs, perverts, idiots, any fucking bastard who could stand on two legs and hold a telegram in his hand. The managers of the hundred and one offices were frightened to death. I laughed. I laughed all day long thinking what a fine stinking mess I was making of it. Complaints were pouring in from all parts of the city.

• From Combating Cult Mind Control: The Guide to Protection, Rescue and Recovery from Destructive Cults (1988)

  “Why?” Nancy wanted to know. “Because there’s important information we think you’ll want to hear. We’ve arranged for some people to come to share what they know with you. We want you to think for yourself about what we’ll discuss, without any interference.” Nancy thought about it for what must have seemed like an eternity. She wanted to know who these people were and why it had to be for three days. Bill said, “Honey, you can find out for yourself. They’re waiting next door. All that we ask is that you trust us, and that you give them a chance to tell you facts the group might not want you to hear.” Nancy listened eagerly, once she saw that everyone was sincere and that we didn’t have horns on our foreheads. She was immensely grateful for all the concern and love shown to her. She had had her doubts about the group but, like most new cult members, thought that she just wasn’t spiritual enough to question or analyze what the older members told her. Within two days, the Twelve Tribes’ hold on her was broken, and she returned to her old life. Why the Johnsons Succeeded Even though their daughter had been recruited into a destructive cult, the Johnsons were very fortunate. First, since they talked with Nancy weekly, they were able to notice some of the changes in her voice and personality very early on. They instinctively knew that they should stay in close touch, because Nancy was young, halfway across the country, and experiencing great stress in her sales work. While the Johnsons could have made sure that Nancy knew about destructive cults before she left, they didn’t realize that the problem could affect anyone, even a member of their family. Furthermore, once they understood the techniques and effects of mind control, they were able to move quickly toward constructive solutions. They did not allow their initial guilt, and their fear that they had failed as parents, to undermine them. Leslie turned out to be a hero. She overcame her fear of angering Nancy and acted like a true friend, by contacting her parents. Because she had done so, the Johnsons were able to quickly identify and resolve the problem. As soon as Nancy was out of the group, she thanked Leslie profusely.

• From Tropic of Capricorn (1934)

  When he asked me if I would like to be his assistant he apologized for offering me such a lowly position; he said I could take my time learning the ins and outs of the job, he was sure it would be a cinch for me. And then he asked me if he couldn’t lend me some money, out of his own pocket, until I got paid. Before I could say yes or no he had fished out a twenty-dollar bill and thrust it in my hand. Naturally I was touched. I was ready to work like a son of a bitch for him. Assistant editor—it sounded quite good, especially to the creditors in the neighborhood. And for a while I was so happy to be eating roast beef and chicken and tenderloins of pork that I pretended I liked the job. Actually it was difficult for me to keep awake. What I had to learn I had learned in a week’s time. And after that? After that I saw myself doing penal servitude for life. In order to make the best of it I whiled away the time writing stories and essays and long letters to my friends. Perhaps they thought I was writing up new ideas for the company, because for quite a while nobody paid any attention to me. I thought it was a wonderful job. I had almost the whole day to myself, for my writing, having learned to dispose of the company’s work in about an hour’s time. I was so enthusiastic about my own private work that I gave orders to my underlings not to disturb me except at stipulated moments. I was sailing along like a breeze, the company paying me regularly and the slave drivers doing the work I had mapped out for them, when one day, just when I am in the midst of an important essay on The Anti-Christ , a man whom I had never seen before walks up to my desk, bends over my shoulder, and in a sarcastic tone of voice begins to read aloud what I had just written. I didn’t need to inquire who he was or what he was up to—the only thought in my head was, and that I repeated to myself frantically—Will I get an extra week’s pay? When it came time to bid good-by to my benefactor I felt a little ashamed of myself, particularly when he said, right off the bat like—“I tried to get you an extra week’s pay but they wouldn’t hear of it. I wish there was something I could do for you—you’re only standing in your own way, you know. To tell you the truth, I still have the greatest faith in you—but I’m afraid you’re going to have a hard time of it, for a while. You don’t fit in anywhere. Some day you’ll make a great writer, I feel sure of it.

• From Saint Thomas Aquinas Collection (22 Books) (2016)

  Now, the names of individual men are always taken from some property of the men to whom they are given. Either in regard to time; thus men are named after the Saints on whose feasts they are born: or in respect of some blood relation; thus a son is named after his father or some other relation; and thus the kinsfolk of John the Baptist wished to call him “by his father’s name Zachary,” not by the name John, because “there” was “none of” his “kindred that” was “called by this name,” as related Lk. 1:59–61. Or, again, from some occurrence; thus Joseph “called the name of” the “first-born Manasses, saying: God hath made me to forget all my labors” (Gn. 41:51). Or, again, from some quality of the person who receives the name; thus it is written (Gn. 25:25) that “he that came forth first was red and hairy like a skin; and his name was called Esau,” which is interpreted “red.” But names given to men by God always signify some gratuitous gift bestowed on them by Him; thus it was said to Abraham (Gn. 17:5): “Thou shalt be called Abraham; because I have made thee a father of many nations”: and it was said to Peter (Mat. 16:18): “Thou art Peter, and upon this rock I will build My Church.” Since, therefore, this prerogative of grace was bestowed on the Man Christ that through Him all men might be saved, therefore He was becomingly named Jesus, i.e. Saviour: the angel having foretold this name not only to His Mother, but also to Joseph, who was to be his foster-father. Reply to Objection 1: All these names in some way mean the same as Jesus, which means “salvation.” For the name “Emmanuel, which being interpreted is ‘God with us,’” designates the cause of salvation, which is the union of the Divine and human natures in the Person of the Son of God, the result of which union was that “God is with us.” When it was said, “Call his name, Hasten to take away,” etc., these words indicate from what He saved us, viz. from the devil, whose spoils He took away, according to Col. 2:15: “Despoiling the principalities and powers, He hath exposed them confidently.” When it was said, “His name shall be called Wonderful,” etc., the way and term of our salvation are pointed out: inasmuch as “by the wonderful counsel and might of the Godhead we are brought to the inheritance of the life to come,” in which the children of God will enjoy “perfect peace” under “God their Prince.” When it was said, “Behold a Man, the Orient is His name,” reference is made to the same, as in the first, viz. to the mystery of the Incarnation, by reason of which “to the righteous a light is risen up in darkness” (Ps. 111:4).

• From Saint Thomas Aquinas Collection (22 Books) (2016)

  PSEUDO-CHRYSOSTOM. For the salvation of men entirely rests upon Christ’s death; nor is there any thing for which we are more bound to render thanks to God, than for His death. He imparted the mystery of His death to His disciples for this reason, namely, because the more precious treasure is ever committed to the more worthy vessels. Had the rest heard of the passion of Christ, the men might have been troubled because of the weakness of their faith, and the women because of the tenderness of their nature, which such matters do commonly move to tears. CHRYSOSTOM. He had indeed told it, and to many, but obscurely, as in that, Destroy this temple; (John 2:19.) and again, There shall no sign be given it but the sign of Jonas the Prophet. (Mat. 12:39.) But now He imparted it clearly to His disciples. PSEUDO-CHRYSOSTOM. That word Behold, is a word of stress, to bid them lay up in their hearts the memory of this present. He says, We go up; as much as to say, Ye see that I go of My free-will to death. “When then ye shall see Me hang upon the cross, deem not that I am no more than man; for though to be able to die is human; yet to be willing to die is more than human. ORIGEN. Meditating then of this, we ought to know that often even when there is certain trial to be undergone, we ought to offer ourselves to it. But forasmuch as it was said above, When they persecute you in one city, flee ye to another, (Mat. 10:23.), it belongs to the wise in Christ to judge when the season requires that he shun, and when that he go to meet dangers. JEROME. He had often told His disciples of His passion, but because it might have slipped out of their recollection by reason of the many things they had heard in the mean while, now when He is going to Jerusalem, and going to take His disciples with Him, He fortifies them against the trial, that they should not be scandalized when the persecution and shame of the Cross should come. PSEUDO-CHRYSOSTOM. For when sorrow comes at a time we are looking for it, it is found lighter than it would have been, had it taken us by surprise. CHRYSOSTOM. He forewarns them also in order that they should learn that He comes to His passion wittingly, and willingly. And at the first He had foretold only His death, but now that they are more disciplined, He brings forth yet more, as, They shall deliver him to the Gentiles.

• From Born on the Fourth of July (1976)

  Table of Contents ___________________ Foreword by Bruce Springsteen Introduction 2005 by Ron Kovic Born on the Fourth of July Chapter One Chapter Two Chapter Three Chapter Four Chapter Five Chapter Six Chapter Seven Postscript Discussion Guide E-Book Extra: Excerpt from Hurricane Street About Ron Kovic Copyright & Credits About Akashic Books For my country and its people, happy birthday Ask not what your country can do for you—ask what you can do for your country. —PRESIDENT JOHN F. KENNEDY January 20, 1961 ACKNOWLEDGMENTS First, I’d like to thank my friend and editor, Joyce Johnson, for the countless hours, including much of her own time, spent helping construct this book, giving it the necessary shape and form. The book could not have been completed without her help and exceptional skills and talents. Thanks also to Roger Steffens—actor, poetry-man, and friend—who gave freely of his time, effort, and energy, retyping almost the entire manuscript up in Mendocino. I’ll remember his patience and understanding, his generosity and love, his faith in me and the book. I’d also like to thank Mary and Sheila and my friend Waldo—a child at sixty —who gave me courage with his eyes and love with his wisdom. And finally, thanks to Connie Panzarino—beautiful, strong, and brave woman—who believed in me and the book years before it had been written. She stood by me like no one else, listening through nights and days, caring and loving, understanding and encouraging, wiping the tears from my eyes. She was like a light shining from the darkness of what seemed to be an endless storm. I am the living death the memorial day on wheels I am your yankee doodle dandy your john wayne come home your fourth of july firecracker exploding in the grave

• From From Shame to Sin: The Christian Transformation of Sexual Morality in Late Antiquity (2013)

  e most that could be hoped for was that the young man, in this frantic period, did nothing to impair his manhood; he needed to pass through “that slippery time” without doing permanent damage to his reputation. Marcus Aurelius, a little cryptically, was grateful that he had managed “to keep safe the bloom of youth and not to become a man before the right hour, in fact to wait a little.” In other words, he had never submitted to a lover, nor did he rush headlong into the aphrodisia at puberty, though even this dreary Stoic had given way to “erotic passions” for a time, before returning to sound control of himself. Ethical strictures lay lightly on young men, who made use of the “mirth conceded to their age.” Th ere was an unwritten “law of youth.” “An un- timely severity is not moderation but gloominess.” Sexual exploration was “practically required training,” after which it was expected the young man would cool off and ease into a more respectable self- control and eventually marriage. Th e “natural violence of youth” was better indulged than repressed, for repression would inevitably fail. Th e sexual escapades of boys in their late teens and early twenties were almost completely inconsequential. By contrast, the more seasoned sexual prowess of youth in their later twenties was a social problem. Th e predatory sexuality of young, unmarried men was a dangerous presence in the ancient Mediterranean city; in a society where men were half a generation older than their wives, the threat of adultery was conceived in generational terms, as a threat emanating from below, from younger men with enough cunning to play the seducer. Th e solution was a high degree of tolerance toward sex with slaves and prostitutes. A father who sensed that his son was in love with a freeborn woman gravely counseled him to use “the venus which is public and permitted.” Th is father, whose son was saved by “the gratifi cation of licit sex,” even ranks among the exempla of so stodgy a moralist as Valerius Maximus. Th e ready availability of licit sexual release gave adultery its dark tint in Roman society. Th e violation of a respectable wife is the paradigmatic form of sexual malfeasance in most human societies. In the Roman Empire, the prohibition on adultery and the imperative of avoiding sexual passivity were the two heavy rules weighing on men. Th ere is little trace of those paradoxical  F R O M S H A M E TO S I N values, familiar in later Mediterranean societies, that simultaneously lionized and vilifi ed the adulterer. In the classical world, the adulterer was purely villainous. Th

• From Combating Cult Mind Control: The Guide to Protection, Rescue and Recovery from Destructive Cults (1988)

  A special thanks to Eric Rayman and his wife, Sue Horton. As an attorney, Eric gets all the credit for helping me reacquire the rights to this book so it could have a second life. He has also helped over many years with legal support and advice in getting my work to the broader public. Susan, thanks for being a friend. I would also like to thank a few other friends: Marc and Elyse Hirschorn, Monica Weiss and Dan Hanson, Elissa Weitzman, Shepherd Doeleman, Karen Magarian, Gary Birns, Russell Backer and Susan Mayer, Michael Stone, Ron Cooper, Steve Morse, Chris Kilham, Hoyt Richards, Taryn Southern, Josh Baran, Masoud Banisadr, and others too numerous to mention here. They know who they are. Some individuals have been my teachers and, at times, my inspiration. I would like to thank Robert Jay Lifton, M.D., Alan W. Scheflin, Daniel Brown, Ph.D., Bill and Lorna Goldberg and Stephen Lankton. Thank you, Christopher Sonn, for your teaching, healing, and guidance on web issues—and for your friendship. I wish to also thank Jorge Carballo, Cathy Colman, Karen Kaplan, and Rebecca Johnston for all of their support. You helped me transform my pain into creativity, flexibility, and creative energy. Special thanks to Dr. Philip Zimbardo, my hero, who taught a course at Stanford University called The Psychology of Mind Control for 15 years. The class uses two chapters of the original CCMC as part of its required reading. Zimbardo has been my mentor and one of my biggest supporters. His Heroic Imagination Project deserves to become a standard curriculum used around the world. Thanks so much to my personal board of advisors: Hank Greenberg, Jay Livingston, Ellen Krause Grossman who have helped be my business coach. Jon Atack has been a friend and a source of enormous assistance. He helped me a great deal with this book. Thank you forensic psychologist teacher of mine for decades, Daniel Brown. Thank you Alan Scheflin for your friendship and advice over the years and for ideas to make the final chapter stronger. Thank you Fred Clarkson for all your assistance and clarity with the religious freedom issue and the Moonies. Cell Whitman gets über kudos for sending me Moonie material. My work at Freedom of Mind Resource Center has led me to many sources of help over the years. My private investigator, Larry Zilliox, has helped me with many cases and maintains the Moon front-group list. My friend and associate in Los Angeles, Rachel Bernstein. I also wish to thank Greta Ioug, my assistant who worked tirelessly to help me bring the 2015 book project to fruition. Thanks to Jane and Kimmy for helping me so much with FOM. Thanks to the folks at Artists for Humanity for helping me design my logo and book cover. Further thanks to my wife Misia, who oversaw the design development. Thank you Artists for Humanity for helping make the book trailer.

• From Bad Behavior (1988)

  “Is she doing well?” “Oh, yes. You know, I don’t ever worry about her anymore. Ever since she’s gotten serious about photography, her whole life’s pulled together. She really works hard. She works for all the papers and magazines in Detroit.” Virginia looked at the pieces of fruit on her plate. “I always thought that Lily could do well if she wanted to,” she said. “She was such a sensitive child. I was sorry I couldn’t do anything to help her.” “Don’t feel that way. You couldn’t have done anything. She was too difficult.” “Yes,” said Virginia. “She was.” “But she has good memories of you,” said Anne. “She used to tell me about going up into the mountains with you. She said that the two of you ate so many olives in the living room together that for years the color of olives made her think of you.” Anne grinned in a hideously open way. Virginia looked at the fruit. “And then do you know what she said? She said, ‘But that’s not right because Virginia’s not like an olive color at all. She’s more golden.’ ” “Oh, stop it,” said Virginia. “But that’s how I always thought of you too, even when you were awful. You were always golden.” Anne was smiling again, her eyes in sad half-moons. She saw that Virginia was embarrassed, so she looked down and picked up a wet piece of melon. She ate it, smiling dimly. The movements of her jaw were neat and careful. Virginia was afraid for a moment that she was going to say something nasty to Anne, though she wasn’t sure why. She had a drink of coffee instead. It was getting cold and oily. “What’s wrong?” Anne was watching her with a dark, naked look. Virginia glanced away. “Nothing.” — They had an old-fashioned family barbecue for Anne’s visit. It was the first one they’d had in a year, and Jarold was excited about it. He was ceremonious and manly beside the smoking barbecue, pronged fork in hand. Anne nervously mixed the salad and talked to Jarold about her job counseling old people in Detroit. Magdalen came out of the house, bringing a flat dish of cold pasta. She put the dish on the card table and her hand on Virginia’s shoulder. “How are you doing, Mama? Did you and Anne have a good time?” “We had a lovely time. We went for a long drive in the mountains.” “Oh, yes,” said Anne. “We actually got out of the car and walked for a long time. I was enthralled. It was just gorgeous.” “Anne must’ve put a pound of rocks in her pockets,” said Virginia. “Every time I turned around, she was picking up something else.” “I love it up there,” said Magdalen. “It’s my salvation.” She moved lightly around the card table, folding napkins.

• From From Shame to Sin: The Christian Transformation of Sexual Morality in Late Antiquity (2013)

  It has been a pleasure working with Sharmila Sen and the staff of Harvard University Press. I am grateful to the anonymous reader who made a number of invaluable suggestions. Above all, I would like to express my gratitude to Glen Bowersock, whose thoughtful guidance has made this a much better book; I have learned much from him about late antiquity in general and literature in particular. It is an honor to be included in the Revealing Antiquity series. Of course, all remaining infelicities and errors are my own stubborn fault. Lastly, I thank my family for their continuous support. Mom, Haley, and Lance are always there for me. My daughter Sylvie is perfect, and she has taught me so much already. The book is dedicated to my amazing wife Michelle, τὸ κάλλος οὐκ ἀνθρώπινον ἀλλὰ θεῖον. Without her love and support it could never have been written. Index Achilles Tatius, 9–10, 19–23, 37–38, 44, 51, 52–53, 58, 70–71, 77–79, 80, 82, 99, 107, 113–114, 123–125, 166, 182, 197, 201–204, 205, 231, 234–235 Actors/actresses, 48, 186, 192, 218, 219, 226–228 Acts, apocryphal, 17, 106–107, 206–213 Adultery, 20, 32, 35, 39, 42–44, 46, 47, 55–56, 67, 74, 90, 97, 100–101, 104, 105, 108, 113, 114, 131, 143–146, 148, 155, 162–165, 168, 170, 173, 175, 179, 188, 199, 241–242 Aelius Aristides, 59 Ambrose of Milan, 165 Anastasius, 186 Androgyny, 33, 96, 147 Antinous, 27–28 Aphrodite, 23, 30, 37, 53, 58, 65, 67, 70, 86, 87, 93, 135, 221, Apocalypse of Peter, 99 Apologetic literature, 13, 83, 100–107, 117–118, 121, 127, 135–136, 176, 221 Aristaenetus, 243 Artemidorus, 28, 146, Artemis, 51, 86, 234 Astrology, 13, 31, 83, 99, 122–129, 140, 144, 151, 175 Athenagoras, 103–104, 111 Athens, 25, 51, 68, 80, 108, Augustine, 4, 49, 118, 140, 154, 160, 161, 165, 166, 167, 172–174, 175–180, 183–184, 238–239 Augustus, 28, 38–39, 43, 64, 148, 168 Avodah Zarah, 214–217, 220 Bardaisan, 124–128, 130, 175 Basil of Caesarea, 144, 181–184 baths/bathing, 42, 47, 53, 56, 60, 98, 207 Caesarius of Arles, 167 Caracalla, 126 Cassius Dio, 42–43, 126 Chariton, 123, 197–199 Chrysippus, 120 Cicero, 38, 64, 148, 153 Cinaedus. See Kinaidos. Claudius, 27 Clement of Alexandria, 11, 36, 67, 84–85, 102, 105–117, 118–119, 126, 163, 179–180, 239 Clementine Recognitions, 130–131, 175 Commodus, 27 Constans, 152–153, 155 Constantine, 2, 15, 134, 136–138, 140, 151–152, 155, 168–171, 174 Constantinople, 156, 158, 161, 164, 175, 183, 186–187 Corinth, 47, 51, 68, 81, 86–87, 91 Council of Ephesus, 176 Courtesan, 25, 36, 47–48, 59, 125, 192, 227 Cyril of Alexandria, 182–183, 184 Cyril of Jerusalem, 175 Dio Chrysostom, 5, 28, 47, 63, 73–75, 77, 114, 115, 147, Diogenes, 59 Dionysus, 58, 86, 114 Divorce, 44, 62, 140, 161, 163–164, 169–171 Domitian, 27 Dreams, 27, 28, 112, 123, 125, 145–146, 202, 225, 227, 230, Eleuthera, 20, 39, 162 Elvira, Council of, 136, 143–144 Encratism, 53, 105–107, 109–110, 112, 115, 160 Epictetus, 72, 75–77, 120–122, 128–129, 179, 239 Eunuchs, 27, 52, 56, 104, 108, 113, 228 Eusebius, 126, 174 Exogamy, 89–90

• From Tropic of Capricorn (1934)

  When he asked me if I would like to be his assistant he apologized for offering me such a lowly position; he said I could take my time learning the ins and outs of the job, he was sure it would be a cinch for me. And then he asked me if he couldn’t lend me some money, out of his own pocket, until I got paid. Before I could say yes or no he had fished out a twenty-dollar bill and thrust it in my hand. Naturally I was touched. I was ready to work like a son of a bitch for him. Assistant editor—it sounded quite good, especially to the creditors in the neighborhood. And for a while I was so happy to be eating roast beef and chicken and tenderloins of pork that I pretended I liked the job. Actually it was difficult for me to keep awake. What I had to learn I had learned in a week’s time. And after that? After that I saw myself doing penal servitude for life. In order to make the best of it I whiled away the time writing stories and essays and long letters to my friends. Perhaps they thought I was writing up new ideas for the company, because for quite a while nobody paid any attention to me. I thought it was a wonderful job. I had almost the whole day to myself, for my writing, having learned to dispose of the company’s work in about an hour’s time. I was so enthusiastic about my own private work that I gave orders to my underlings not to disturb me except at stipulated moments. I was sailing along like a breeze, the company paying me regularly and the slave drivers doing the work I had mapped out for them, when one day, just when I am in the midst of an important essay on The Anti-Christ , a man whom I had never seen before walks up to my desk, bends over my shoulder, and in a sarcastic tone of voice begins to read aloud what I had just written. I didn’t need to inquire who he was or what he was up to—the only thought in my head was, and that I repeated to myself frantically—Will I get an extra week’s pay? When it came time to bid good-by to my benefactor I felt a little ashamed of myself, particularly when he said, right off the bat like—“I tried to get you an extra week’s pay but they wouldn’t hear of it. I wish there was something I could do for you—you’re only standing in your own way, you know. To tell you the truth, I still have the greatest faith in you—but I’m afraid you’re going to have a hard time of it, for a while. You don’t fit in anywhere. Some day you’ll make a great writer, I feel sure of it.

• From Henry and June (1986)

  When I was through brushing (and his brush was full of white hairs), I thanked him. He said very nervously, “Will you come and have coffee with me?” I said no, as I thought, what would it have been like if I had painted my eyes? Hugo says my letter to Henry is the slipperiest thing he has ever seen. I begin so honestly and frankly. I seem to be June’s opposite, but in the end I am just as slippery. He thinks I will disturb Henry and upset his style for a while—his raw strength, his “pisses and fucks,” in which he was so secure. When I wrote to Henry, I was so grateful for his fullness and richness that I wanted to give him everything that was in my mind. I began with great impetus, I was frank, but as I approached the final gift, the gift of my June and my thoughts about her, I felt reticent. I employed much craft and elusiveness to interest him, while keeping what was precious to me. I sit down before a letter or my journal with a desire for honesty, but perhaps in the end I am the biggest liar of them all, bigger than June, bigger than Albertine, because of the semblance of sincerity. His real name was Heinrich—how I prefer that. He is German. To me he seems like a Slav, but he has the German sentimentality and romanticism about women. Sex is love to him. His morbid imagination is German. He has a love of ugliness. He doesn’t mind the smell of urine and of cabbage. He loves cursing, and slang, prostitutes, apache quarters, squalor, toughness. He writes his letters to me on the back of discarded “Notes”—fifty ways of saying “drunk,” information on poisons, names of books, bits of conversation. Or lists like this: “Visit Café des Mariniers on river bank near Exposition Bridge off Champs Elysées—sort of boarding house for fishermen. Eat ‘Bouillabaisse,’ Caveau des Oubliettes Rouges. Le Paradis, rue Pigalle—rough point, pickpockets, apaches, etc. Fred Payne’s Bar, 14 rue Pigalle (see the Art Galerie downstairs, rendezvous of English and American show girls). Café de la Régence, 261 rue St. Honoré (Napoleon and Robespierre played chess here. See their table).” Henry’s letters give me the feeling of plentitude I get so rarely. I take great joy in answering them, but the bulk of them overwhelm me. I have barely answered one when he writes another. Comments on Proust, descriptions, moods, his own life, his indefatigable sexuality, the way he immediately gets tangled in action. Too much action, to my mind. Undigested. No wonder he marvels at Proust. No wonder I watch his life with a realization that my life will never resemble his, for mine is slowed up by thought. To Henry: “Last night I read your novel.

• From Born a Crime: Stories from a South African Childhood (2016)

  The money kept rolling in and I was balling out of control. This is how balling I was: I bought a cordless telephone. This was before everyone had a cellphone. The range on this cordless phone was strong enough that I could put the base outside my window, walk the two blocks to McDonald’s, order my large number one, walk back home, go up to my room, and fire up my computer, carrying on a conversation the whole time. I was that dude walking down the street holding a giant phone to my ear with the aerial fully extended, talking to my friend. “Yeah, I’m just goin’ down to McDonald’s…” Life was good, and none of it would have happened without Andrew. Without him, I would never have mastered the world of music piracy and lived a life of endless McDonald’s. What he did, on a small scale, showed me how important it is to empower the dispossessed and the disenfranchised in the wake of oppression. Andrew was white. His family had access to education, resources, computers. For generations, while his people were preparing to go to university, my people were crowded into thatched huts singing, “Two times two is four. Three times two is six. La la la la la.” My family had been denied the things his family had taken for granted. I had a natural talent for selling to people, but without knowledge and resources, where was that going to get me? People always lecture the poor: “Take responsibility for yourself! Make something of yourself!” But with what raw materials are the poor to make something of themselves? People love to say, “Give a man a fish, and he’ll eat for a day. Teach a man to fish, and he’ll eat for a lifetime.” What they don’t say is, “And it would be nice if you gave him a fishing rod.” That’s the part of the analogy that’s missing. Working with Andrew was the first time in my life I realized you need someone from the privileged world to come to you and say, “Okay, here’s what you need, and here’s how it works.” Talent alone would have gotten me nowhere without Andrew giving me the CD writer. People say, “Oh, that’s a handout.” No. I still have to work to profit by it. But I don’t stand a chance without it. — One afternoon I was in my room making a CD when Bongani came over to pick up his inventory. He saw me mixing songs on my computer. “This is insane,” he said. “Are you doing this live?” “Yeah.” “Trevor, I don’t think you understand; you’re sitting on a gold mine. We need to do this for a crowd. You need to come to the township and start DJ’ing gigs. No one has ever seen a DJ playing on a computer before.”

• From Saint Thomas Aquinas Collection (22 Books) (2016)

  I answer that, Nothing is handed down in the canonical Scriptures concerning the sanctification of the Blessed Mary as to her being sanctified in the womb; indeed, they do not even mention her birth. But as Augustine, in his tractate on the Assumption of the Virgin, argues with reason, since her body was assumed into heaven, and yet Scripture does not relate this; so it may be reasonably argued that she was sanctified in the womb. For it is reasonable to believe that she, who brought forth “the Only-Begotten of the Father full of grace and truth,” received greater privileges of grace than all others: hence we read (Lk. 1:28) that the angel addressed her in the words: “Hail full of grace!” Moreover, it is to be observed that it was granted, by way of privilege, to others, to be sanctified in the womb; for instance, to Jeremias, to whom it was said (Jer. 1:5): “Before thou camest forth out of the womb, I sanctified thee”; and again, to John the Baptist, of whom it is written (Lk. 1:15): “He shall be filled with the Holy Ghost even from his mother’s womb.” It is therefore with reason that we believe the Blessed Virgin to have been sanctified before her birth from the womb. Reply to Objection 1: Even in the Blessed Virgin, first was that which is natural, and afterwards that which is spiritual: for she was first conceived in the flesh, and afterwards sanctified in the spirit. Reply to Objection 2: Augustine speaks according to the common law, by reason of which no one is regenerated by the sacraments, save those who are previously born. But God did not so limit His power to the law of the sacraments, but that He can bestow His grace, by special privilege, on some before they are born from the womb. Reply to Objection 3: The Blessed Virgin was sanctified in the womb from original sin, as to the personal stain; but she was not freed from the guilt to which the whole nature is subject, so as to enter into Paradise otherwise than through the Sacrifice of Christ; the same also is to be said of the Holy Fathers who lived before Christ. Reply to Objection 4: Original sin is transmitted through the origin, inasmuch as through the origin the human nature is transmitted, and original sin, properly speaking, affects the nature. And this takes place when the off-spring conceived is animated. Wherefore nothing hinders the offspring conceived from being sanctified after animation: for after this it remains in the mother’s womb not for the purpose of receiving human nature, but for a certain perfecting of that which it has already received.

• From Tropic of Capricorn (1934)

  I was swamped with gratitude, with good wishes, with invitations, with pathetic, tender little gifts. If I had had real power instead of being the fifth wheel on a wagon, God knows what I might not have accomplished. I could have used the Cosmodemonic Telegraph Company of North America as a base to bring all humanity to God; I could have transformed North and South America alike, and the Dominion of Canada too. I had the secret in my hand: it was to be generous, to be kind, to be patient. I did the work of five men. I hardly slept for three years. I didn’t own a whole shirt and often I was so ashamed of borrowing from my wife, or robbing the kid’s bank, that to get the carfare to go to work in the morning I would swindle the blind newspaperman at the subway station. I owed so much money all around that if I were to work for twenty years I would not have been able to pay it back. I took from those who had and I gave to those who needed, and it was the right thing to do, and I would do it all over again if I were in the same position. I even accomplished the miracle of stopping the crazy turnover, something that nobody had dared to hope for. Instead of supporting my efforts they undermined me. According to the logic of the higher-ups the turnover had ceased because the wages were too high. So they cut the wages. It was like kicking the bottom out of a bucket. The whole edifice tumbled, collapsed on my hands. And, just as though nothing had happened they insisted that the gaps be plugged up immediately. To soften the blow a bit they intimated that I might even increase the percentage of Jews, I might take on a cripple now and then, if he were capable, I might do this and that, all of which they had informed me previously was against the code. I was so furious that I took on anything and everything; I would have taken on broncos and gorillas if I could have imbued them with the modicum of intelligence which was necessary to deliver messages. A few days previously there had been only five or six vacancies at closing time. Now there were three hundred, four hundred, five hundred—they were running out like sand. It was marvelous. I sat there and without asking a question I took them on in carload lots—niggers, Jews, paralytics, cripples, ex-convicts, whores, maniacs, perverts, idiots, any fucking bastard who could stand on two legs and hold a telegram in his hand. The managers of the hundred and one offices were frightened to death. I laughed.

• From Saint Thomas Aquinas Collection (22 Books) (2016)

  JEROME. That none should say, I am poor and therefore cannot be hospitable, He takes away even this plea by the instance of a cup of cold water, given with good will. He says cold water, because in hot, poverty and lack of fuel might be pleaded. And whosoever shall give to drink to one of the least of these a cup of cold water only in the name of a disciple, verily I say unto you, he shall not lose his reward. REMIGIUS. The least of these, that is, not a prophet, or a righteous man, but one of these least. GLOSS. (non occ.) Note, that God looks more to the pious mind of the giver, than to the abundance of the thing given. GLOSS. (ord.) Or, the least are they who have nothing at all in this world, and shall be judges with Christ. HILARY. Or; Seeing beforehand that there would be many who would only glory in the name of Apostleship, but in their whole life and walk would be unworthy of it, He does not therefore deprive of its reward that service which might be rendered to them in belief of their religious life. For though they were the very least, that is, the greatest of sinners, yet even small offices of mercy shewn them, such as are denoted by the cup of cold water, should not be shewn in vain. For the honour is not done to a man that is a sinner, but to his title of disciple. CHAPTER 11 11:1–61. And it came to pass, when Jesus had made an end of commanding his twelve disciples, he departed thence to teach and to preach in their cities. RABANUS. The Lord having sent out His disciples to preach with the foregoing instructions, Himself now fulfils in action what He had taught in words, offering His preaching first to the Jews; And it came to pass when Jesus had ended all these sayings, he passed thence. CHRYSOSTOM. (Hom. xxxvi.) Having sent them forth, He withdrew Himself, giving them opportunity and time to do the things that He had enjoined; for while He was present and ready to heal, no man would come to His disciples. REMIGIUS. He well passes from the special teaching which He had delivered to His disciples, to the general which He preached in the cities; passing therein as it were from heaven to earth, that He might give light to all. By this deed of the Lord, all holy preachers are admonished that they should study to benefit all. 2. Now when John had heard in the prison the works of Christ, he sent two of his disciples, 3. And said unto him, Art thou he that should come, or do we look for another? 4. Jesus answered and said unto them, Go and shew John again those things which ye do hear and see:

• From Born a Crime: Stories from a South African Childhood (2016)

  The final piece of the story came from my mom, who could only tell us her side after she woke up. She remembered Abel pulling up and pointing the gun at Andrew. She remembered falling to the ground after getting shot in the ass. Then Abel came and stood over her and pointed his gun at her head. She looked up and looked at him straight down the barrel of the gun. Then she started to pray, and that’s when the gun misfired. Then it misfired again. Then it misfired again, and again. She jumped up, shoved him away, and ran for the car. Andrew leapt in beside her and she turned the ignition and then her memory went blank. To this day, nobody can explain what happened. Even the police didn’t understand. Because it wasn’t like the gun didn’t work. It fired, and then it didn’t fire, and then it fired again for the final shot. Anyone who knows anything about firearms will tell you that a 9mm handgun cannot misfire in the way that gun did. But at the crime scene the police had drawn little chalk circles all over the driveway, all with spent shell casings from the shots Abel fired, and then these four bullets, intact, from when he was standing over my mom—nobody knows why. My mom’s total hospital bill came to 50,000 rand. I paid it the day we left. For four days we’d been in the hospital, family members visiting, talking and hanging out, laughing and crying. As we packed up her things to leave, I was going on about how insane the whole week had been. “You’re lucky to be alive,” I told her. “I still can’t believe you didn’t have any health insurance.” “Oh but I do have insurance,” she said. “You do?” “Yes. Jesus.” “Jesus?” “Jesus.” “Jesus is your health insurance?” “If God is with me, who can be against me?” “Okay, Mom.” “Trevor, I prayed. I told you I prayed. I don’t pray for nothing.” “You know,” I said, “for once I cannot argue with you. The gun, the bullets—I can’t explain any of it. So I’ll give you that much.” Then I couldn’t resist teasing her with one last little jab. “But where was your Jesus to pay your hospital bill, hmm? I know for a fact that He didn’t pay that.” She smiled and said, “You’re right. He didn’t. But He blessed me with the son who did.” [image file=image_rsrc2V0.jpg] For my mother. My first fan. Thank you for making me a man. [image "Acknowledgments" file=image_rsrc2V1.jpg] For nurturing my career these past years and steering me down the road that led to this book, I owe many thanks to Norm Aladjem, Derek Van Pelt, Sanaz Yamin, Rachel Rusch, Matt Blake, Jeff Endlich, and Jill Fritzo.

• From Saint Thomas Aquinas Collection (22 Books) (2016)

  I answer that, It was fitting for the body assumed by the Son of God to be subject to human infirmities and defects; and especially for three reasons. First, because it was in order to satisfy for the sin of the human race that the Son of God, having taken flesh, came into the world. Now one satisfies for another’s sin by taking on himself the punishment due to the sin of the other. But these bodily defects, to wit, death, hunger, thirst, and the like, are the punishment of sin, which was brought into the world by Adam, according to Rom. 5:12: “By one man sin entered into this world, and by sin death.” Hence it was useful for the end of the Incarnation that He should assume these penalties in our flesh and in our stead, according to Is. 53:4, “Surely He hath borne our infirmities.” Secondly, in order to cause belief in the Incarnation. For since human nature is known to men only as it is subject to these defects, if the Son of God had assumed human nature without these defects, He would not have seemed to be true man, nor to have true, but imaginary, flesh, as the Manicheans held. And so, as is said, Phil. 2:7: “He . . . emptied Himself, taking the form of a servant, being made in the likeness of men, and in habit found as a man.” Hence, Thomas, by the sight of His wounds, was recalled to the faith, as related Jn. 20:26. Thirdly, in order to show us an example of patience by valiantly bearing up against human passibility and defects. Hence it is said (Heb. 12:3) that He “endured such opposition from sinners against Himself, that you be not wearied. fainting in your minds.” Reply to Objection 1: The penalties one suffers for another’s sin are the matter, as it were, of the satisfaction for that sin; but the principle is the habit of soul, whereby one is inclined to wish to satisfy for another, and from which the satisfaction has its efficacy, for satisfaction would not be efficacious unless it proceeded from charity, as will be explained ([4019]XP, Q[14], A[2]). Hence, it behooved the soul of Christ to be perfect as regards the habit of knowledge and virtue, in order to have the power of satisfying; but His body was subject to infirmities, that the matter of satisfaction should not be wanting.