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Desire

Desire is not a synonym for sex and it is not a synonym for wanting. It is the body's motivated lean toward intimacy, beauty, or more contact — the architecture of being-pulled. Vela holds the erotic register at the center but does not collapse the social, the cognitive, and the devotional registers into it: the corpus reads desire across all four, and the texture is in the difference.

Working definition · Motivated pull toward intimacy, beauty, or more contact—not mere preference.

6874 passages · 2 Vela essays

Vela’s read on this emotion

Desire is one of the emotions Vela reads most carefully, because the English word covers too much ground to leave undifferentiated. Four registers run inside it.

The erotic register is the most familiar. Vela reads it through Carmen Maria Machado, Garth Greenwell, Sappho's surviving fragments, and Audre Lorde's essay *Uses of the Erotic* — writers who treat erotic desire as serious subject matter rather than ornament. The social register — the desire to belong, to be seen correctly, to matter to a community — runs through memoir and through the literature of exile. The cognitive register — desire for the right word, for understanding, for mastery — surfaces in Plato's *Symposium* and in Augustine of Hippo's *Confessions*, where desire is examined as a form of motion of the soul. The devotional register — desire for God, or for the absolute — runs through the *Song of Songs*, Teresa of Ávila, John of the Cross, and the broader mystical tradition.

Desire is not the same as yearning, longing, or love. Yearning is desire facing what it may not reach. Longing is yearning settled into chronicity. Love is the sustained orientation that survives desire's exhaustion. The four words are kin; Vela reads them separately because the writers who have been most honest about each have kept them separate.

*On Desire* — the slower companion essay in the magazine — walks the four registers and makes the case for not collapsing them.

Study and magazine

Long-form guide in the magazine

*On Desire* — the four-register reading. Desire as architecture, not virtue: how the word holds erotic, social, cognitive, and devotional registers at once, and what the writers keep saying when the four are not collapsed.

Read the guide

Passages

Every passage tagged with this emotion in the Vela corpus. Search the body text, narrow by source or register, click through to a book’s profile to see how the passage sits with the rest of the work.

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6874 tagged passages

  • From Best Erotic Romance

    He meant to resist, but she had his shirt up and was running her cool hands along his belly, tucking them into his waistband. “Come down with me,” she said. She tugged him down as she went, both of them falling to the ground, the clover a cushion of sweet flower and the quiet buzzing of sun-warmed honeybees. He remembered his wire cutters at the last second, tossed them sideways out of the way. Maddy cupped the back of his head, brought him down for a giggled, honey-dipped kiss of lips and tongue. Laughing, they rolled, crushing the clover, bringing him again on top, part of her face covered with the sprigs of green and pink. Looking down at her was pleasure and a kind of pain that squeezed his chest and his cock at once. So beautiful and so his, but in that, the worry of losing her too. “Fuck me, Dustan.” Maddy’s eyes up to him, through him. “Please.” And then that thing that always happened, when the giggling stopped and their mouths opened and met, their bodies, still clothed, lined up against each other. As though a switch had been flipped, that electric heat that ran through them both, conducted by desire and pleasure. Dustan felt it everywhere—the tip of his cock, the edges of his lips as they touched hers, his fingertips. Sometimes he thought his very hair stood on end with the want. “Gladly,” he said. “I’ve been thinking about fucking you all morning.” And, here in that moment, he could talk, fully. He could say all the things in his head without tripping on his tongue, without the words halting him. His face burned when he said things like that, but it burned with a good thing, a safe and yet still dangerous thing. “But I think I’ll make you wait....” Her moan was everything to him, that small sound bitten back behind her lips. He pushed her dress up around her hips, watched the pale skin appear above the carpet of green. She had nothing on underneath, her golden-brown hair trimmed and curled. He dipped a finger, heard the soft groan as she arched her hips toward him, felt his cock harden fully at the feel of her, wet and wanting. He tucked another finger, marveled as always at the tight, warm pull of her around him. His thumb found the small peak of her clit, circled it lightly until she released another sigh. He could smell her—the sweet arousal from between her legs, the clover crushed beneath her each time she raised and lowered her hips into his hand. “Please,” she said. Her voice was graveled and breath-broken. The one time she had no words, a moment he loved for, lived for. “You’re making me...mmm...wait...on purpose.”

  • From Best Erotic Romance

    His sky-blue eyes were narrowed and focused on her; his smile was slow in coming and full of dark promise. “There’s a seat free here.” “Thanks.” Jodi hopped up onto the stool, hiking her skirt up to accommodate the stiffness of the denim. His gaze settled on her exposed thighs, and she suddenly found it difficult to breathe. Were they supposed to be strangers, then? Was this how he wanted to play it tonight? She gathered her courage. “Would you like a drink?” He considered her for a long moment. “You’re buying?” She shrugged and the thin strap of her top fell down her arm. “It’s the twenty-first century. We’re supposed to be equal now.” “Then I’ll have a beer.” He caught the eye of the harried bartender straight away and the woman came right over. Jodi held up two fingers. “Two beers please.” “Sure.” She went to open her purse, and he put his hand over hers. The strength and warmth of it shocked her into stillness. “Don’t worry about it yet. I’ve already set up a tab. We can settle up later.” “Actually, I was going to check my cell.” His grip tightened. “Don’t you remember our deal? No cell phones and no texting. This is our time.” “Okay,” Jodi whispered and waited for him to move away, but instead he picked up her hand and turned it over. “Nice nails.” “I usually keep them short.” Jodi admitted. “But this seemed like a special occasion.” He brought her hand to his mouth and kissed her knuckles. “I like a woman scratching my back and digging her claws in my ass.” “Yeah?” She said weakly. His tongue flicked out, and he licked her index finger and then he sucked it gently into his mouth. Jodi wanted to whimper as her nipples tightened until she knew he’d be able to see them through the silk of her top. The arrival of the frosted beer bottles made her jump, and he released her hands. She took a hasty swallow and then watched him drink the whole bottle, the regular motion of his tanned throat just adding to her anticipation. He put the empty down and slowly wiped a hand over his mouth. He gestured at her unfinished beer. “Do you want a glass for that?” “No, I’m fine with the bottle.” A smile kicked up the corner of his beautiful mouth. “Always a nice sight for a man, seeing a woman’s lips locked around the neck of a bottle.”

  • From Best Erotic Romance

    “You think same time, same place, two weeks from now is a commitment?” She hated the tinge of bitterness in her voice. He’d never made her promises, never alluded to more than what they had during their Vegas liaisons. It wasn’t fair that she was angry at him for not giving her more, but she couldn’t help how she felt. “That’s not enough for me.” Straightening, he yanked his T-shirt over his head. Her eyes swept hungrily over his torso, admiring the tight lacing of abdominal muscles that flexed as he moved. He was so virile. Truly breathtaking. Tattoos covered both of his arms from shoulder to elbow in gorgeous half-sleeves. His chest was broad, golden, and bare...except for her name, which crossed the pectoral over his heart. “It was never going to be enough.” Robin sucked in a tremulous breath, stunned by the sight of ink that hadn’t been there previously. Her gaze rested on the new tattoo, her vision blurring with tears. “Paul…” “I do love fucking you.” He pulled a fresh condom out of the nightstand drawer and rolled it on. “When I’m not inside you, I’m thinking about it.” Setting his hands on her inner thighs, he pushed into her. She whimpered, her tender pussy tightened by her recent orgasms. “God, you feel good,” he breathed. “I’ve needed you so much.” His size, so long and thick, was perfect. As if he’d been made for her. Pushing onto her elbows, Robin watched his glistening cock pull free. The heavily veined length was as brutal looking as the rest of him. The sight of it turned her on further. It made her feel powerfully feminine, like a freakin’ sex goddess, to incite the raging lust of a man who was so potently masculine and primal in his sexuality. Robin’s tongue traced the curve of her lower lip. “Please,” she whispered, feeling empty without him. She’d been feeling empty since she walked out on him, physically and emotionally. He sank back into her with a low hiss of pleasure. “You’re so sexy, baby. So damn perfect and beautiful. I have no fucking idea what you’re doing with a guy like me, but I’m grateful. Every damn day.” God help her. She loved him so much. He tugged the tie at her waist and pushed the two halves of her dress open. He released the center clasp of her bra, freeing her breasts into his waiting palms. Her pussy tightened around him, echoing the gentle rolling of her nipples between his talented fingers. “I’m so sorry.” He was flushed and shiny with sweat, his beautiful hazel eyes as red as hers felt. “So damn fucking sorry that I ever let you think, for even a moment, that you were nothing but a convenient piece of ass to me. I loved you the moment I saw you. I should have told you—”

  • From Best Erotic Romance

    He pushed her against the back of the elevator, pulling up her skirt, greedy fingers stroking her thighs, finding her panties, and sliding beyond the thin lace to her soaked pussy. He groaned, his kiss deepening further, and Joanna answered his arousal by gripping his ass, longing for the firm flesh to be free of his trousers. Boxers or briefs, what would it be? The chime rang almost mute beneath their panting and groping, but when the doors opened, Joanna moaned against Tom’s mouth, pushing him toward the gate, closer to fulfillment. His fingers circled her clit. The suction of the kiss broke as she pushed him, grinding her hips against his hand, gasping for air. He stepped back, their dance made of steps banned by Arthur Murray. His heel caught on the metal lip of the elevator as they stumbled back, balance completely lost until his thighs hit the back of the sofa in the elevator landing. Golden wallpaper with subtle fleur-de-lis appliqués rose to a ceiling dominated by a tasteful, frosted light fixture. Several other upholstered chairs, end tables, and two huge vases filled with fresh flowers furnished the little lobby. He spun, a final effort to save both of them a tumble over the couch back. When Joanna’s butt hit the top of the sofa she welcomed the full weight of him, the momentum of their fall pressing him harder into her. Her lips found his again, ravenous, drawing his flesh into her even as his fingertips stroked the folds of her pussy and slid easily into her. Electric bites of pleasure zapped her nerves, spreading heat and sensation through her. Her hips ground against his hand spastically, graceless, but honest and greedy. Tom continued to press her against the back of the sofa, pulling her skirt up, her panties down. He took his hand from her clit long enough to pull her blouse free of the waistband of her skirt, reaching under it, under her lace bra to her breasts, cupping them as if he weighed them, testing her hard nipples, circling the tips until she panted. He pulled back just enough to turn her away from him, so that his cock bumped her butt. He pinned her, holding her still, and when he took his hands from her, she felt like a boiling pot with the fire suddenly turned off. The crinkle and tear of plastic registered moments before his hands again found her skin, one stroking the curve of her ass, the other stroking up the crack of her pussy, teasing her, spreading her. The stroke of his cock head along her pussy lips nearly shoved her over the edge. Coated in her juices, he pressed into her from behind, his cock thick, hard and gloriously filling. His exhalation bordered on a moan, and with his balls slapping her butt, he paused, buried deep.

  • From Best Erotic Romance

    I want to fill you up.” He kissed her mouth. “Next time, bring your vibrator with you, okay?” “Sure.” If there was a next time …Jodi attacked the snaps on his shirt to reveal every inch of his muscled chest. He didn’t need to go to the gym to work out. Life on a ranch was hard enough. She went to unbuckle his belt, and he caught her hand. “Give me the belt when you’ve taken it off me. I want to try something new.” Jodi stared up at him, her mouth suddenly dry. She handed him the belt, and before she could start on his jeans, he moved off her. “Kneel on the bed with your hands behind your back.” She did what he said, her body trembling with a combination of apprehension and excitement. He’d always been adventurous in bed, and she loved every single kinky thing he’d ever shown her. He wrapped the belt around her wrists and pulled the leather tight through the buckle. “Kneel up.” Jodi managed it somehow and he drew the rest of the belt down between her ass cheeks until it was pressed flat against her wet pussy. He came to stand in front of her, one hand working the zipper of his jeans, the other reaching for the end of the belt. “Suck my cock.” He guided her head toward his shaft, and she took him deep and sucked hard. His hand fisted in her hair, and he rolled his hips in tandem to her sucking. “That’s good, honey.” He murmured, his voice turning her on even more. From the corner of her eye, she saw him wrap the end of the belt around his hand. He jerked the leather, sending a jolt of sensation running back along her pussy to her bound wrists. He pulled on the belt again making her moan and writhe against the friction. She wasn’t sure whether the sensation was painful or pleasurable, but she didn’t care anymore. There was no shame in this. It was all about giving each other what they both so desperately needed. His hand tightened in her hair. “We’re running out of time. Let go of my cock and get on your hands and knees.” Reluctantly Jodi released him, and he helped her turn onto her hands and knees, her wrists still bound with his belt, her ass arched toward him. She shivered as the belt fell away from her sex and at least four of his fingers slid into her pussy. “Please.” She whispered. “Fuck my ass, please.”

  • From Best Erotic Romance

    My bottom quivered in the aftermath of the unexpected smack. I supposed that was a no. He bobbed down under the bed again, looking for more devilish implements. “It’s an unorthodox treatment,” he said, coming back up. “I’m writing up my findings for the medical journals. It’s proving very effective, but it can be a little difficult to administer if the patients are too mobile. So...” He applied a leather cuff to my left wrist, chaining me to the outer post of the headboard. “...I think restraints are in order...but it’s nothing to worry about....” He repeated the process with my right wrist. “It’s all perfectly safe. Trust me. I’m a doctor. Now, get up on your knees and spread them.” Promptly I obeyed, slipping about on the wet rubber sheet until I was positioned for optimum obscene display. “If you make a sound,” he cautioned, “the treatment will be ineffective and I will have to use something stronger on that sore bottom of yours. So complete silence for this, understand?” I nodded, full of joyful dread. “It’s called orgasm therapy,” he told me. A smooth bulb-shaped presence made itself felt at my cunt. “Come-vales-cence.” “Oh, that’s terrible,” I groaned, and then I squeaked as the bulbous head of the vibrator was shoved unceremoniously forward, breaking through yielding flesh and lodging inside. “I said silence! That’s five strokes of the strap for you, later.” I held my breath and concentrated on the easy passage of the silicone intruder up to its full length, where it rested for a while before beginning to buzz gently. Matthew’s fingers, now sheathed in surgical gloves, manipulated my clitoris, bringing it to its swollen point of no return, making me gasp silently and strain against my bonds. His exact and precise knowledge of my most intimate places frightened me sometimes. It was as if he had a book stored in his head called How to Touch Loveday, every word of which he had memorized. Heat rushed to the spot, and the slow vibrations inside me brought me to a first rapid climax. Mixed with the intensity was an edge of panic as I wondered if orgasmic silence was possible. Why hadn’t he gagged me? It would make things so much easier. Oh. That was why. I bit my lip, pulled at my bonds, let the tremors build up and radiate through me, concentrating on feeling myself at the center of them rather than expressing them in my habitual broken yowls. “You’re coming, aren’t you? That’s good. Very good. Let it out. That’s right. But we haven’t finished yet.”

  • From Best Erotic Romance

    He switched up the setting on the vibrator, placed a buzzer on my clit, and moved his soaked gloved fingers up the crack of my bum to find the unoccupied hole. I wanted so badly to cry out when he began the loving, unhurried business of lubrication, but I held back, my thighs shuddering, cunt in turmoil, sore throat totally forgotten, while he circled and probed, circled and probed, over and over and over. “I think this is where the dosage will be given,” he pronounced. A low sound would have escaped me, if my faulty throat hadn’t provided salvation. My head was in thrall to my body, my instructions and resolutions on the verge of being forgotten. I had to remember to be quiet. I had to make sure the treatment worked. His fingers spread my tight-furled asshole, preparing it thoroughly, examining its depth and width with scientific care. “Yes,” he said. He was struggling to stay calm, I could tell, and I was struggling not to come, wanting to save myself for the moment of possession. Over the buzzing and the insistent roar of my blood in my ears, I heard the unbuckling of belts, the lowering of trousers, the removal of undergarments and then he was behind me, holding my flanks, nudging up against the vibrator at first then parting my cheeks. “Take your medicine,” he breathed, then his impossible width amazed me anew by edging through my anal defenses, gathering lube on the way. I puffed and clenched my fists, trying not to resist, trying to wrap myself up in the dark comfort blanket of total submission, feeling and knowing myself to be his in every way. Penetrated in every orifice except the one I had to keep such stringent control of, I slid down inside myself, becoming a creature of sex and surrender, a helpless patient having to accept that my doctor knew better than me. The dosage was strong and the side effects included some discomfort and a few pangs, but the best medicine has unpleasant features, so I accepted it willingly, pushing myself back to take his entire length, showing him my trust. “That’s good,” he said, beginning a slow thrust, rubbing up against the vibrator in my other hole with each push forward.

  • From Stone Butch Blues (1993)

    Together we began to undress her—my need, her urgency. I pulled off my chinos and my dress shirt. I was wearing only a white T-shirt and BVDs. My hands ran up her thighs and down the inside crevices. I could feel her heat and wetness through her underwear. I began to work my body down her, using my lips and tongue to create new erogenous zones all over her rib cage and stomach. My fingers took hold of the elastic on her underwear and began to slide it down her thighs as her hands grabbed my eats firmly and stopped me. I looked at her with a question on my face. “P?’m just gettin’ over my period,” she said. I shrugged. “Sor” Emotions played across Annie’s face: disbelief, anger, relief, pleasure. Pleasure was the unmistakable emotion still on her face as I began to tease her thighs with my mouth. She gave into her own desire and, in doing so, reached her orgasm with an almost relaxed trust. I held her close to me as her breathing slowed. She ran her fingers through my hair, stroked my back. Her touch felt so good that tears welled up in my eyes and spilled down my cheeks. “What’s wrong, darlin’?”’ she asked with concern. I shook my head and buried my face in her shoulder. For the moment her arms protected me from my own life. My mouth was near her nipple. I felt Annie’s breath quicken. She tugged at my T-shirt. “Take it off,’ she insisted. I hesitated. It was dark in the room. I was on top of her, so she couldn’t see the two lines across my chest that revealed it had been reshaped. I took off my T-shirt. Annie ran her nails actoss my shoulders, down my back. I shivered with pleasure. Her nails pressed deeper into my flesh as she moved her pelvis against mine. She was relaxed with me, until the moment I was above her, ready to enter her. I stroked her thighs until she looked up at me. “It’s for you, or not at all,” I told her. “T want you so bad,” she whispered hoarsely. We both moaned softly as she said that. I pulled my dildo carefully out of my briefs in the dark, afraid of being discovered. What made me think this could work? I rolled a condom onto my dildo. “I don’t think I can have any more kids,” she told me. “T don’t want to take any chances, and it’s up to me, after all,’ I said. “Well, ain’t that a switch,” she laughed.

  • From Best Erotic Romance

    Jodi swirled her smallest finger in the wetness they’d created and tilted her hips forward so that she could ease the tip of her finger inward through the tight pucker of her ass. She imagined his cock there too, much bigger and more demanding, making her beg him to stop, to never stop, to fuck her until she was hoarse from screaming. The drive hardly seemed to take a minute before he stopped the truck. “Stay here.” Jodi was quite happy to oblige him. She wasn’t sure if she wanted to move ever again. She continued to touch herself until he opened her door and stared down at her. “Christ,” he muttered and bent his head to lick her fingers and clit. She climaxed hard, pushing her sex into his questing tongue. Before she finished coming he picked her up and strode toward a dimly lit building, pausing only to slide the card in the lock and kick the door open with one booted foot. He snapped on the light. The room smelled of dust, bleach, and old carpet but she didn’t care. There was a bed and a bathroom, and that was all they’d ever needed. He laid her carefully on the bed. “I want to see you naked. I never get to see you naked anymore.” She helped him remove her clothes and then he came down over her, his mouth on her breast, one hard thigh between her legs tormenting her already sensitive clit. His fingers slid into her from behind and probed her slick entrance. “Damn, I wish I had two cocks. I want to fill you up.” He kissed her mouth. “Next time, bring your vibrator with you, okay?” “Sure.” If there was a next time…Jodi attacked the snaps on his shirt to reveal every inch of his muscled chest. He didn’t need to go to the gym to work out. Life on a ranch was hard enough. She went to unbuckle his belt, and he caught her hand. “Give me the belt when you’ve taken it off me. I want to try something new.” Jodi stared up at him, her mouth suddenly dry. She handed him the belt, and before she could start on his jeans, he moved off her. “Kneel on the bed with your hands behind your back.” She did what he said, her body trembling with a combination of apprehension and excitement. He’d always been adventurous in bed, and she loved every single kinky thing he’d ever shown her. He wrapped the belt around her wrists and pulled the leather tight through the buckle. “Kneel up.” Jodi managed it somehow and he drew the rest of the belt down between her ass cheeks until it was pressed flat against her wet pussy. He came to stand in front of her, one hand working the zipper of his jeans, the other reaching for the end of the belt. “Suck my cock.”

  • From Best Erotic Romance

    When the weekend his flatmate was away coincided with the weekend that Kyle went to stay with his dad, Samuel took the chance to issue a casual invitation. Cassie had beamed, quickly affirming her intention to come over bearing wine and after-dinner mints. Now here she was in his tiny kitchenette, looking like the most sophisticated date a man could possibly wish for. When she’d walked in earlier that evening he’d nearly dropped the pan he’d been holding. The dress she wore was simple but elegant, with a low scooped neckline and a hemline that finished high on the thigh. Then there were the glossy shoes and stockings. When she’d sat down she had crossed her legs high on the thigh. He’d hardened immediately and had to turn away and pour himself a glass of water to help push the image from his mind. “Sorry, that probably came across badly,” he blurted, trying not to mess this up. “I didn’t mean to imply I was spending time with Kyle to get to you.” “Don’t worry, I didn’t think that.” She sipped her wine, then skewered a piece of Thai spiced chicken with her fork and took it to her mouth. She closed her eyes appreciatively as she ate the offering, savoring each and every morsel. That wasn’t helping him form sensible statements. He was having a hard time expressing himself, and this was important. He had to show her he was serious, and he had to know if she would take him—a younger man—seriously. “I enjoy Kyle’s company, he’s a great lad, but I was hoping to get to know you better as well.” “You will.” With her napkin she dabbed at her lips. The promise in her words made him want to rush through the dinner, or abandon it. Gesturing at her plate with her fork, her face filled with something akin to orgasmic pleasure. “Mmm, I love Thai food.” “So I see.” It seemed like the understatement of the century. It was a huge compliment to his cooking, but her expression wasn’t helping Samuel to concentrate. And, if he wasn’t mistaken, he could see her nipples outlined through the fabric of her dress. He’d never be able to smell lemongrass again without remembering the way she looked that night. “Tell me, why didn’t you ask me out earlier?” Samuel stared across at her, his fork frozen midway between his plate and his mouth. “I wasn’t sure you’d take me seriously, so I waited.” She nodded, looking deep into his eyes. “I was cautious with you at first, because I had to be sure I wasn’t on the rebound. My husband left me for a younger woman, I wanted to be sure I was here for the right reasons.” That’s what he’d surmised, and now he knew that she’d been anticipating this too, biding her time. “As time went by,” she continued, “I was sure. I’m not on the rebound. I’ve been hoping you’d ask me over.”

  • From Best Erotic Romance

    “Why?” he kept walking and she felt his cock start to grow again. “I like you exactly where you are.” “But what if someone sees us?” “I’d like that.” He steadied her with one strong arm wrapped around her hips and unlocked the truck. “I’d like them to see me fucking you.” In one fluid motion he opened the passenger door and sat her on the edge of the seat still facing him, his cock growing and pulsing inside her. He was tall enough that he didn’t need to join her in the cab, he just widened his stance, grabbed hold of her ass, and started pounding into her again. “Nice and wet, just how I like you.” When she realized she could plainly see the back door of the bar, Jodi closed her eyes and just hung on, hoping that their current solitude would continue. His teeth closed on her throat, and she stared up at him. “Stop worrying and concentrate on fucking me. We don’t have all night.” That was true. They never had this freedom anymore. Jodi kissed him, drawing on his tongue. His pace increased until all she could hear was the pounding of their hearts and the slick wet sounds of body parts slamming together until her world narrowed to the sensations in her clit and the desperate need to come. He climaxed and she joined him, clinging tightly to his crumpled and damp shirt as he groaned her name. When he drew away, she whimpered at the sudden loss of his heat. He kissed her nose and rearranged her legs on the seat until she faced forward. He even put her seatbelt on, his mouth lingering over the swell of her breast. The roar of the truck engine startled her and she stared out into the darkness, a lump forming in her throat. “Are we done?” She didn’t want to go home to domesticity. She wanted this to last forever. “Hell, no, we’re not done.” He glanced at her as he backed out of the parking space. God knows how he’d managed not to lose his cowboy hat, but it was now planted firmly on his head. “Just do something for me before I start driving. Spread your legs wide and rub your clit. I want to make you come straight away when I next get inside you.” She slowly opened her legs, aware that he was watching her, his narrowed gaze fixed on her wet sex. She touched her clit and gently circled it with the tip of her finger. “Yeah, that’s good.” His voice was rougher now. “Now slide your little finger in your ass because you know I’m going to fuck you there before we’ve finished tonight.”

  • From Best Erotic Romance

    Make it happen again.” “I don’t know if I can.” “You’re my wife now, Sophie. You have to do what I say in bed. And it’s not just that piece of paper. You yourself gave me your pussy as a gift. So I want it to drool all over my stomach to show me how turned on you are.” Sophie wanted to do as he asked, but her body’s strange new response was really beyond her control. Still, it was her duty to try her best to satisfy her husband’s carnal appetites. And so she began to grind her swollen lips against his belly, in an effort to produce another mysterious effusion of desire. Justin grabbed her ass and squeezed hard. “I like it that you’re so horny you have to masturbate on me, but I’m not sure if you’re trying hard enough. Do I have to spank you to get you to obey? Now that you’re mine, I can punish you when you don’t please me.” Sophie stiffened as if she’d actually been struck. In an instant, a fresh puddle of her hot juices pooled onto his belly. Justin arched back into the mattress. “Fuck, I love that. How do you do that?” “You’re doing it to me. It’s you,” Sophie admitted. “You like this, huh?” “Yes, but I like you inside me even more. Mind if I climb on?” He’d never turned down such a request before, but tonight Justin merely narrowed his eyes. “Don’t you know a proper woman waits for her husband to decide these matters? Besides, when we lie together as man and wife for the first time, you’ll be beneath me, where you belong. Do you understand?” Sophie opened her mouth to protest—where the hell did he get off spouting this patriarchal shit anyway?—but her complaint turned to a helpless whimper as she felt another gush below. “I understand,” she said, her eyes lowered meekly. “Then lie on your back and bring your knees up to your chest so your sopping pussy will be nice and tight.” Trembling, Sophie complied. She felt so naked and exposed, holding her knees open for him, uncertain what rough, domineering treatment awaited. And yet her body seemed to trust him. Every fiber of her being shivered with delicious anticipation. Justin knelt between her legs, his eyes surveying her. “I’m going to consummate our marriage now. Then you’ll be mine.” His tone was gruff rather than loving, but at that moment Sophie felt her chest wrench open, as if he’d reached in and tugged on her heart. As she waited breathlessly, her husband took his dick in his hand and rocked forward. But he didn’t slide it in. Instead he pressed the head of his cock against her clit. She moaned.

  • From Best Erotic Romance

    Keeping his gaze on me, I let my tongue fall gently out of my mouth and let the smallest lick move across the head. I wrapped my lips around him, taking the soft, velvety head between my wet lips. His gasp shot straight to my pussy, sending heat through me. I sucked him gently, until his eyes finally closed, his head digging back into the pillow. Slowly I licked my way down the under side of his cock, flicking and gently sucking the tender sensitive ridge. Licking my way back up, I wrapped my mouth around him again and let his cock sink deep, deeper into my throat. “Oh God, Daisy. Please, let me fuck you.” I let the vibration of my stifled giggle buzz against him, and he let out a sharp moan. I took him deeper still into my throat, and his fingers stroked my neck, wrapped through my hair. My insistent, persistent sucking was driving him mad. The beautiful cut of his hips rested beneath my hands, the trembling I felt now passed on to him. He didn’t let me go on much longer. Moving me gently up, he kissed me so hard, I thought I would never catch my breath. Every time I thought he was finished with my mouth, he kissed me again. Tongues plunging, tracing, finding new places to go. I was above him, his cock resting mere inches from my dripping wet pussy. “I love you, Daisy.” “I love you too, Blake.” His name was barely out of my mouth when I felt the thick tip of his cock settle between my waiting cunt lips. He eased me down onto him, slowly inching me closer and closer to his body. When he slipped to the hilt, I rested on his lap, unable to move. I thought my body was going to come apart. His hands wrapped around my hips, gently rocking me front and back. Finally, my mind returned and I slid up and down his cock, feeling the sweet, deep pull of him with every stroke. I couldn’t look away from his eyes. His hands freed my hips and roamed my body, touching off electric shocks with each pass. I was so deliciously full; his cock stretching me open, hitting deeper with each thrust. He pulled me forward to devour my mouth with his sweet kisses, taking my mouth. My clit was rubbing against his body, and I swirled my hips around in a circle as he plunged into me. I felt my body tightening, every muscle building with tension and pleasure. His thumbs rolled over my nipples, the tight flesh barely able to take much more. My body was shaking, and I felt my orgasm building in me, deep and powerful. Blake let his thumb drop lower, and I felt it stroke over my warm wet clit, and I exploded. My body cried out violently, gripping Blake’s cock deep inside me, my whole body contracting around him.

  • From Stone Butch Blues (1993)

    She turned on the light in her bedroom as we walked in. A Harley-Davidson gas tank hung from the ceiling. “You like bikes?” she asked me. I nodded. I walked over to the light switch and snapped it off. She stood awkwardly near her bed. I came up behind her and rested my hands on her shoulders. I lifted her hair with one hand and nipped the nape of her neck with my lips. I pressed my pelvis gently against her ass as I pulled her shoulders back so that my mouth could take more of her neck. Annie turned and gently pulled me down on the bed. She trembled. “Are you afraid?” I asked. “Fuck you,” she answered with a twisted smile. “You’ve been hurt before,” I said to myself out loud. “What woman hasn’t?” she snapped. I rolled over on my back and pulled her against my body. “I'd really like to make you feel good,” I whispered. “If you’d trust me enough to show me what you want.” Stone Butch Blues 205 “What’s your trip, mister?” she snorted. “You want to fuck or not?” “We can if you want to,” I said. “Or we can do other things. It’s up to you.” Annie did a double take. “Whatdya mean it’s up to me?” “It’s your body. What do you want? I mean, you can show me how you really want to be touched. Or you can act excited and hope I come—not too quick, but don’t take too long—tight?” Annie shook her head and sat bolt upright. “You're scaring me,” she said. “Because I want you to really be there when I touch you?” She nodded, “Yeah, exactly.” I lay quietly. “T don’t know if I can,’ she said. I sat up and took her in my arms. “Try,” I whispered and pulled her down on top of me. I rolled Annie over on her back as I kissed her, deep and long, I unbuttoned her blouse with slow steady fingers and teased her breasts for a long time before I came near her nipples with my fingertips. Then I brushed them, lightly, and felt her body shudder. I took each nipple in my mouth and played with it ever so gently. Somehow she told me with her body where to touch, how to touch, when to touch. As I rubbed the front 206 = Leslie Feinberg of her jeans I could feel her passion building, but she deserved the luxury of wanting it real bad. Then she said something to me I knew took a lot of courage. “I’ve always wanted to come before I fuck.” She turned her head away in shame. I kissed the part of her throat she left exposed. “Anything you want,” I told her. She turned her head to look at me. She had tears in her eyes. “Anything?” she asked.

  • From Best Erotic Romance

    “Angela, is there somethin’ you want?” You, preferably naked and tied spread-eagle on a bed so you can’t stop me nibbling every edible part of you. “Angela?” “Is there something I want? Yeah, there is.” “Then just say it.” But I couldn’t. I felt foolish enough. I reached into my purse and drew out his key ring. “Look, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have taken this so far.” “You made me wait half an hour, when I could have been home, showered and in bed. You know how long I’ve been out this time.” “I know. I arranged the schedule.” Still, he didn’t take the keys. I took a step toward him and had to tilt my head to maintain the lock on his gray gaze. His hands settled on my waist. “You want somethin’, sweetheart?” he repeated, his voice lowering to a sexy rumble. I squeezed my eyes shut, prayed for courage and that the blush staining my cheeks would fade. “I want you,” I said, then opened my eyes. His grin widened. “Now, was that so hard?” “Matter of fact it was.” He bent toward me, his gaze narrowing on my mouth, but I turned away my face. “Not here. Your rig.” His eyebrows shot up, and he pushed me gently back. “After you. You know where I’m docked, and you have a key. Let yourself inside and get comfortable. I’m hittin’ the locker room for a quick shower. I smell like diesel.” He turned on his heel, giving me another view of that backside I’d drooled over for months. A moan slipped from my mouth, and I heard a chuckle as he pushed through the door and left me standing weak-kneed in his wake. He let me wait a good twenty minutes before the door to his cab opened, and he climbed inside. The scent of plain soap swept into the cab that already smelled like him—musky male, diesel. But since he didn’t smoke and didn’t appear to collect his meals, it smelled pretty good for a trucker’s rig. Light shone from the top of a tall post in the parking lot, illuminating the cab. Security cameras would record who entered the truck but I hoped wouldn’t disclose what we were about to do inside the cab. Another reason I’d waited until tonight for this. Everyone would be blabbing. I sat in the plush leather passenger seat and glanced away as he climbed up into the driver’s seat. “Change your mind?” he asked softly. “No,” I bit out, a little annoyed that he asked. I wanted him to take the initiative, not seek my approval every step of the way. “Then why aren’t you in the back?” “Look, you don’t have to feel obligated,” I said, turning to meet his smoky gray gaze. “If you’d rather get some sleep…” “I jerked off in the shower.” My jaw sagged just a little, then snapped closed. “Now, why are you tellin’ me a thing like that?”

  • From Best Erotic Romance

    “Yes, but I like you inside me even more. Mind if I climb on?” He’d never turned down such a request before, but tonight Justin merely narrowed his eyes. “Don’t you know a proper woman waits for her husband to decide these matters? Besides, when we lie together as man and wife for the first time, you’ll be beneath me, where you belong. Do you understand?” Sophie opened her mouth to protest—where the hell did he get off spouting this patriarchal shit anyway?—but her complaint turned to a helpless whimper as she felt another gush below. “I understand,” she said, her eyes lowered meekly. “Then lie on your back and bring your knees up to your chest so your sopping pussy will be nice and tight.” Trembling, Sophie complied. She felt so naked and exposed, holding her knees open for him, uncertain what rough, domineering treatment awaited. And yet her body seemed to trust him. Every fiber of her being shivered with delicious anticipation. Justin knelt between her legs, his eyes surveying her. “I’m going to consummate our marriage now. Then you’ll be mine.” His tone was gruff rather than loving, but at that moment Sophie felt her chest wrench open, as if he’d reached in and tugged on her heart. As she waited breathlessly, her husband took his dick in his hand and rocked forward. But he didn’t slide it in. Instead he pressed the head of his cock against her clit. She moaned. Justin rubbed her with his tool, like a big, swollen finger, claiming her there first. She was so wet, his penis slipped over her slick flesh with a faint, slurping sound. “Please, take me,” she choked out. On the next stroke, he guided his cock to her hole and buried himself to the hilt. They groaned in unison. He began to move, slowly, pressing tight against her to give her the friction she needed. “You belong to me now and I’m going to make you come,” he hissed in her ear. Another gush of wetness glazed the crack of her ass. Justin’s balls slapped against her cleft as he drove into her, stimulating the tender flesh. He took her nipple in his mouth and sucked hard. Tying the knot—those words had scared her, confused her, but that’s just how Sophie felt now, deliciously tied and tangled, her legs twisted around his ass, a knot of lust throbbing low in her belly. With each thrust, Justin seemed to push deeper, conquering unknown territory. Because no one had ever touched her this way before, not even the sweet Justin she’d watched sleeping that very morning. No one had ever opened her so completely—her cunt, her heart, her head all at once—to expose yearnings secret even to herself. “Come for me, Sophie,” he panted. “I order you to come right now.”

  • From Best Erotic Romance

    Only his legs were too long and he lay at a diagonal, crowding my knees. I slid a thigh between his legs and climbed over his body. When I sat atop his hips, he smoothed his palms up my torso, rolling up the shirt. When that flew over the seats, he reached around me and expertly opened the clasp of my bra. Without the underwire, I worried that my heavy breasts would sag too much, but he hefted them in his palms and his breaths deepened. “I’ve wanted to suck on these forever.” I gave a short, strangled laugh. “I wouldn’t have said no.” “Then why’d you wait so long?” “Why didn’t you make the first move? Are you really that arrogant that you have to have a woman come to you?” “I didn’t think you’d say yes.” “Really?” He grunted, the sandpaper pads of his thumbs continuing to rasp over my nipples. “You’re pretty. Smart too. And you have every man drivin’ sniffin’ after you.” “But you’re handsome. I bet you don’t get many no’s from women.” He arched a brow. “Okay, so not handsome like a movie star. But you’re rugged and built like a god. I didn’t think you’d want me. I’m too old for you.” “There’s only eleven years between us.” I raised my brows. “How do you know that?” “I ate your birthday cake and counted the candles.” When he pinched my nipples, I tensed, my eyelids dipping. “I guess eleven years doesn’t really matter,” I gasped, “when all we’re doin’ is screwin’ around.” He pinched harder, then holding my gaze he came up on his elbows and rooted at one of my breasts, sucking the tip, and more, into his mouth. His moan was deep and gravelly. I felt it all the way to my toes. My other breast tingled, dimples popping up around the areola and the tip sprung. I cupped it with my palm to ease the ache, but he pulled away my hand and shook his head, wagging my breast right along. I gave a strangled laugh. “So not sexy.” He released my breast. “Got any complaints about my technique?” “Maybe about your pacing.” I ground against his erection. “You’re killin’ me here.” “Get your clothes off,” he growled. “You first.” “No way. I’m the guy. I get off on watchin’.” I swallowed hard, but I’d asked for this. Wanted for him to take charge, and he had with a vengeance if that hard-eyed look was any indication. I slid down beside him and rolled to my back, then awkwardly tugged off my shoes, tossing them between the seats in front of us, then shimmied out of my skirt, being careful not to lose the scrap of lace shielding my sex from his hungry gaze. Danny slid a finger under the lacy band at my hip, pulled it, and let it go to snap against my skin. “Not nice.” “I didn’t tell you to stop.”

  • From Best Erotic Romance

    She kissed him, grinding along the front of him as much as she could while he was holding her. Her mouth tasted like raspberries and cream. She wiggled along him, and he had to put her down, out of breath and bending backward. Her bare feet—the toenails painted like mini-suns—disappeared into the clover. “Maddy, you shouldn’t be barefoot out here.” He could hear the scolding in his voice, couldn’t help it. “You’re going to step on a pricker. Or a bee. Or worse.” “I’m fine,” she said. “Besides, I’m only interested in being stuck by this particular pricker.” He wondered, as he often did, if her daddy knew what a wild creature she was. He doubted it. Her hand found the front of him, already half-hard, tickling her fingers over his zipper. The flash of her ring in the sunlight as she stroked him, lifting her head, laughing. “Maddy,” he said. “What?” All innocent, that look, as her gaze caught his—she had deep brown eyes, big and dark, lightly flecked with gold in the centers, and thick dark eyelashes, a sharp contrast to her lighter hair. On one of their first dates, he’d told her, “You have eyes like a Jersey calf.” He hadn’t meant to say it—words were his enemy, mostly, things that bit at his tongue and made his cheeks fire. But Maddy hadn’t laughed at him; she hadn’t gotten angry at being compared to a cow. She’d said, “I don’t have to moo when we have sex for the first time, do I?” He’d never thought a woman could say things like that. She said things like that all the time. Words loved her. And he knew then that he wanted to love her like that. The crazy thing was that she let him do just that. Madeline O’Hara, daughter of Fire Chief O’Hara, Queen of the Country Fair, she of the proper “Please” and “Thank you,” she of the gold-brown corn-tassel hair and the calf-brown eyes. Dustan had seen her his whole life, of course, the way he’d seen all the town girls he’d grown up with. From the outside. Genqua wasn’t even that big of a town, but it was big enough to split the farmers and ranchers from the ones who had town jobs, town roles. Maddy O’Hara wasn’t just way out of his ballpark. Maddy O’Hara was out of his league. Except they’d met, officially, for the first time in a ballpark. Dustan playing for the farm team, Maddy’s brothers playing for the townies. The farm team had won, and they were heading off for drinks, when this girl in a daisy-yellow sundress and white sandals crossed the field, calling his name. “Dustan,” she said, although everyone else called him Dusty so he didn’t know it was his name she was saying until she got close and touched his shoulder.

  • From Best Erotic Romance

    She was rubbing up against him. That devious cock of his reared up against Jane’s belly with delight, surging forward to meet her with bold joy and god-damn-whoa lust that made his heart ache. They collapsed together, falling against the couch and scrabbling not to break the embrace. John’s pajamas were a flimsy barrier, and Jane had his cock extricated and standing proud within seconds. In turn, John plucked at her kimono, pushed it roughly aside to free her breasts. He squeezed tenderly, leaning down to suckle and bite, but not hard enough to bruise. “Yes,” said Jane, “more, please more.” He looked up and caught sight of the clock behind her head, just to the left of the framed record cover. Five A.M. Dawn was starting to turn the sky light. His neighbor’s tits were in his face, her nipples still wet from his mouth, and the music. The music was still playing. “Excuse me,” John said, and laid Jane down gently on the couch. He padded over to the stereo, trying to cover his awkward hard-on while Jane sighed behind him. “What are you doing?” she asked, as he lifted the needle from the record and cut the singer off in midchorus. Silence bloomed between them. John met her eyes, saw the restless spark and the tiredness in them. He moved to her and sank onto his knees in front of the couch. “You love music,” he murmured, whispering now as the quiet boomed in his ears. Jane nodded as he pulled her jeans open and bared her pubic hair, the top of her clit. “So lie back,” John said, lowering his head. “And listen.” He put his mouth to her, bending like a monk in prayer. The nerves in Jane’s body all rushed between her legs, every fiber and pore of her pricked and readied for his touch. And he was quick. His tongue slid between her lips with delicate precision. Should she have guessed? Someone who danced at the edges of life, who flattened himself against walls to keep from brushing against her? Yes, she thought as she closed her eyes and let out a deep breath. That supple, skillful mouth working against her now, that flicking and licking and sucking. Only a quiet man could be that good. Only someone who listened, who was sensitive to the minute ebb and flow of things. Without the bath of music she was used to, her ears reached out to find the smaller noises. In the gap of silence, she heard a new tiny, intimate melody, so unfamiliar it was nearly embarrassing. There were only the wet sounds of him eating her. The creak of the futon spring under the weight of their swaying, rocking bodies. And her own ragged breath, quickening, rising to meet his silent intent. She wound her hands into his hair. “Come up here,” she said quietly.

  • From Born a Crime: Stories from a South African Childhood (2016)

    Tom, always the hustler and the dealmaker, stepped in. “Bra Abie,” he said. “I don’t think you understand. If you saw the girl Trevor is taking to the dance, you would see why this is so important. Let’s make a deal. If we bring her here and she’s the most beautiful girl you’ve ever seen in your life, you’ll let him take the BMW.” Abel thought about it. “Okay. Deal.” We went to Babiki’s flat, told her my parents wanted to meet her, and brought her back to my house. Then we brought her around to the garage in the back where Abel and his guys were working. Tom and I went over and introduced them. “Abel, this is Babiki. Babiki, this is Abel.” Abel smiled big, was charming as always. “Nice to meet you,” he said. They chatted for a few minutes. Tom and Babiki left. Abel turned to me. “Is that the girl?” “Yes.” “You can take the BMW.” Once I had the car, I desperately needed something to wear. I was taking out this girl who was really into fashion, and, except for my Timberlands, everything I owned was shit. I was limited in my wardrobe choices because I was stuck buying in the shops my mother let me go to, and my mother did not believe in spending money on clothes. She’d take me to some bargain clothing store and tell me what our budget was, and I’d have to find something to wear. At the time I had no clue about clothes. My idea of fashion was a brand of clothing called Powerhouse. It was the kind of stuff weight lifters wear down in Miami or out at Venice Beach, baggy track pants with baggy sweatshirts. The logo was a cartoon of this giant bodybuilding bulldog wearing wraparound sunglasses and smoking a cigar and flexing his muscles. On the pants he was flexing all the way down your leg. On the shirt he was flexing across your chest. On the underwear, he was flexing on your crotch. I thought Powerhouse was the baddest thing in the world, I can’t even front. I had no friends, I loved dogs, and muscles were cool—that’s where I was working from. I had Powerhouse everything, the full range, five of the same outfit in five different colors. It was easy. The pants came with the top, so I knew how to make it work. Bongani, the other middleman from my CD business, found out I had a date, and he made it his mission to give me a makeover. “You need to up your game,” he said. “You cannot go to the dance looking the way you look—for her sake, not yours. Let’s go shopping.”

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