Bewilderment

Passages

Every passage tagged with this emotion in the Vela corpus. Search the body text, narrow by source or register, click through to a book’s profile to see how the passage sits with the rest of the work.

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• From Introduction to the Hebrew Bible and Deutero-Canonical Books (2018)

  Ruins of Ancient Samaria. The Marriage Metaphor The opening words of the Lord to Hosea are arresting, to say the least: “Go, take for yourself a wife of whoredom and have children of whoredom, for the land commits great whoredom by forsaking the L ORD .” This command has bewildered modern commentators as much as it must have astonished Hosea. Some medieval Jewish commentators thought the whole experience was a prophetic vision. Some modern commentators have also tried to deny that the episode has any historical value. We shall find, however, that one of the ways in which prophets communicated with their audience was by symbolic action. (We have already seen an example of this in the story of Micaiah ben Imlah in 1 Kings 22. A memorable example is provided in Isaiah 20, where the prophet catches the attention of the people of Jerusalem by going naked and barefoot for three years.) Hosea’s marriage must be seen in that context. It is exceptional in the degree to which it involves his whole family, but it is quite typical insofar as it uses nonverbal communication to convey its message. Some scholars have suggested that Hosea discovered his wife’s promiscuous disposition only after he married her, but the symbolism of the action requires that she was known to be promiscuous from the start. Because of this, some have thought that she must have been a prostitute, perhaps even a sacred prostitute who played a ritual part in the cult of the Canaanite god Baal. Recent scholarship, however, has cast severe doubt on whether prostitution played any part in the cult of Baal. In any case, the book of Hosea does not say that the woman in question, Gomer, played any such role. She may have been a prostitute, or she may have been a woman with a reputation for promiscuous behavior. The children of Hosea and Gomer are made to bear the prophet’s message by symbolic names. The first was named Jezreel, the name of the summer palace of the kings of Israel. It was at Jezreel that Jehu had slaughtered Jezebel and the royal family (2 Kings 9). Jeroboam II and his short-lived son Zechariah were the last kings of the line of Jehu, and this oracle must date from their time. There

• From Introduction to the Hebrew Bible and Deutero-Canonical Books (2018)

  they were speaking falsely on his behalf, and in this he was right. We should not necessarily conclude that, in the view of the author, God does pervert justice. Rather, the point is that God does not comply with human conceptions of justice and is under no obligation to do so. The poet Robert Frost, in his play, A Masque of Reason, has God return after one thousand years to thank Job for his services: God, I’ve had you on my mind a thousand years To thank you someday for the way you helped me Establish once for all the principle There’s no connection man can reason out Between his just deserts and what he gets. This insight flew in the face of traditional wisdom, and indeed of much of the Hebrew Bible. The point was not lost on Frost: You realize by now the part you played To stultify the Deuteronomist And change the tenor of religious thought. My thanks are to you for releasing me From moral bondage to the human race. The friends are not treated harshly, although they are subjected to the indignity of having to rely on the intercession of Job. The epilogue provides a happy ending all around, in the manner of comedy rather than tragedy. Job’s fortunes are restored. Now all his relatives, and those who had known him before, all of whom were conspicuous by their absence up to this point, come out of the woodwork to show him sympathy. Each gives him a piece of money and a gold ring. Job’s wealth is doubled, and he is given a new family to replace the old one, with the nice touch that the daughters are now given an inheritance with their brothers. (Even the daughters of Zelophehad in Numbers 27 were allowed to inherit only because they had no brothers.) We might think, initially, that Job was restored to his original state, with some enhancement. But he ought to have learned something from the experience. No great confidence could be placed in people who professed their friendship when he was restored, when they had been absent in his time of need. And he should know from experience that all the newfound wealth and family that he is given at the end could be lost again in one bad day. Never again should Job be so

• From Introduction to the Hebrew Bible and Deutero-Canonical Books (2018)

  JUDITH The final novella under review in this chapter is set in the land of Israel. Like the others, it has the superficial trappings of historical narrative. It gives dates and places in great detail. But the expectation that this is a reliable history is quickly dispelled. In the very first verse we read that Nebuchadnezzar ruled over the Assyrians and lived in Nineveh. What Jewish person in the Second Temple period could possibly have been so ignorant about the king who destroyed Jerusalem? It has been suggested that the author falsified history intentionally for comic effect. More plausibly, he may have wished to associate Nebuchadnezzar with Assyria because the real threat to Judea when the story was written came from Syria, the home of the great persecutor of the Jews in the second century B.C.E., Antiochus Epiphanes. The story begins with a fictional account of a battle between Nebuchadnezzar and the completely fictitious Arphaxad of Media. The western provinces refuse to come to the aid of the Assyrian king, and so he resolves to destroy them. After he has subdued the Medes, he sends his general Holofernes westward. Most of the peoples submit to him, but the Israelites prepare to resist. The fictional town of Bethulia becomes the focal point of the attack (the name recalls Bethel, but also the Hebrew word betulah, “virgin,” which is used several times in connection with Zion). When Holofernes hears of their preparation, he makes inquiries about them from Achior the Ammonite (the name recalls the famous Assyrian sage Ahikar, who was mentioned in the book of Tobit). Achior provides a summary of the history of Israel and assures Holofernes, in Deuteronomic fashion, that Israel will only be conquered if the people have offended their God. Holofernes responds indignantly, “Who is God but Nebuchadnezzar?” (6:2). Achior is bound and left outside Bethulia until he is rescued by the Jews, who welcome him. Holofernes now lays siege to Bethulia. Some of the people lose heart and reproach their rulers for not making peace with the Assyrians. Only at this point, approximately halfway through the narrative in chapter 8, is

• From Little Sister: A Memoir (2019)

  S 33 A New Glimpse at the Forbidden World 1960 hortly after tutoring began in mid-September, Sister Catherine assembled the children in the study hall. The room had been set up with folding chairs, and she beckoned us to sit down, Little Sisters on one side and Little Brothers on the other. At the back of the room, Brother Philip sat at a machine with a wheel about two feet in diameter, and in front of us was a large white screen on a tripod. Without an explanation, Sister Catherine pulled down the shades, and the room became dark. From the machine came a whirring sound. Lights flashed, and then on the screen appeared the words: The Song of Bernadette. It was our introduction to the movies. For a few moments, I was mesmerized. But soon I found myself becoming dizzy. The larger-than-life faces of people and cars moving across the screen so close to my eyes was disorienting. I took a deep breath, and as a wave of nausea came over me, I had to shut my eyes to calm my stomach. For what seemed hours, I sat with my eyes closed, listening to the movie and praying for it to end. At last the whir of the reel subsided, the lights came on, and we clapped. I pretended to enjoy the experience, but inside I wondered why anyone would want to go to the movies. Things improved when movies became part of the community activity, and we all congregated in the large living room on Friday and Sunday nights. There the distance between the chairs and the screen relieved my nausea, and the subject

• From Little Sister: A Memoir (2019)

  only mine. I was struck by how differently the thirty-nine of us approached life, religion, and relationships after the similarity of our upbringing, defined by the deprivation of parental affection and a regime of rules and punishments. Only two of the thirty-nine remain in religious life. Several others made a commitment to that life but eventually left in their twenties, thirties, and even sixties. Some of the thirty-nine remained resolutely Catholic, while others took a more laissez-faire attitude toward religion and more than a few abandoned religion entirely. There were marriages and divorces, as well as couples who chose to live together unwed. There were Ivy League graduates and those who did not attend college at all; straight and gay; financially successful professionals, with careers in medicine, psychiatry, engineering, and finance; and a few who struggled to face life’s daily challenges. Despite a staunchly conservative upbringing, there was a large contingent of Democrats, as well as some Republicans, Libertarians, and Independents. Some enjoyed gathering at an annual summer reunion in Still River, while others refused to speak to anyone at the Center again. In a way, we represented a microcosm of society in this country, notwithstanding the unusual circumstances of our early life. Thirty-nine children were raised in an experiment—part of the vision of a woman who believed she could supersede the “evil” forces of nature and mold human beings into a cadre of religious zealots who would follow her, in cult-like fashion, embracing a celibate way of life for God. Where was Leonard Feeney’s input in all this? He was the spiritual leader of the Center. Sadly, once we moved to Still River, his role as leader was titular at best. A romantic at heart, he needed to be admired and praised, and he sought the approbation of those who would give it. That weakness gave Catherine Clarke the upper hand, and despite the fact that she could not hold a candle to Feeney on matters of theology, she usurped his role. He was not strong enough to counter her. Was Catherine Clarke’s vision conceived in the moment of crisis that forced the Center into hiding in 1949? It seems more likely it was honed piecemeal as she became increasingly enamored of her own power. Did she ever concern herself with the thought that she might get pushback from some sixty highly intelligent, educated, and sophisticated men and women as she manipulated them

• From Reading Biblical Literature: Genesis to Revelation (2016)

  Lecture 34—Paul on Gender Roles and Slavery 231 of mutual respect, mutual service, and mutual leadership seem consistent with that. But a passage that subjects women to men does not. ‹ The same is true for the issue of slavery. There are texts in both the Old and New T estaments that take slavery as a given. They might advocate for humane treatment of slaves, but they do not challenge slavery as an institution. But in the Old T estament, God delivered people out of slavery, and in Galatians, Paul says that in Christ, there is no longer slave or free. ‹ As we’ve seen, in the New T estament, we encounter multiple sides of Paul. In the letters, he speaks with harshness about the scandal of Jesus’s crucifixion, then waxes eloquent about the character of Christian love. He was sharply critical of his opponents yet impassioned about the need for reconciliation. Those who work deeply with Paul’s writings find themselves outraged and intrigued, affirmed and provoked. It is hard to remain neutral about his work. And that is perhaps why we continue to read it. Suggested Reading Johnson and Noel, Onesimus Our Brother. Osiek and Macdonald, A Woman’s Place. Questions to Consider 1. What perspectives on slavery were expressed in the letters considered in this lecture? At what points did writers adapt common Roman practices? At what points did they redefine common perspectives on slavery? 2. What perspectives on the roles of women and men were reflected in the letters considered in this lecture? How did the lecture deal with the different points of view? What other approaches to dealing with the different view might be helpful?

• From Reading Biblical Literature: Genesis to Revelation (2016)

  54 LECTURE 8 Violence and Kindness in the Promised Land A s you recall, Joshua led the people of Israel into Canaan, capturing the cities of the Promised Land. For many readers, this is a disturbing account of violent conquest. Some interpreters have tried to move beyond the violence by relegating it to the past. Others reject the book because it seems to commend violence. As an alternative approach, we’ll compare Joshua to Judges and Ruth. Judges is a haunting account of the tragic side of violence. It begins with heroism but ends in a tragic civil war. The book of Ruth then shows a remarkable openness to outsiders. In this lecture, let’s ask what it means to have these three viewpoints side by side. Joshua ‹The story of Joshua opens as the people of Israel approach the Jordan River. Moses is now dead, and the people are being led by Joshua, a warrior. In the opening chapter, Joshua is told to be faithful to God and God will be faithful to him. This call for obedience is a central theme of the book, and Joshua exemplifies it. ‹Joshua’s first challenge will be the city of Jericho. Here, the priests lead a procession across the Jordan River. When their feet touch the water, the river stops flowing so the people can walk across on dry land. Next, the priests lead a procession around the city of Jericho once each day for six days. On the seventh day, they march around the city seven times. The trumpets sound, the people shout, and the walls of Jericho come tumbling down. ‹The collapse of the walls is followed by Joshua’s men utterly destroying the city and the people in it. The practice is called cherem in Hebrew. It means that something is completely given over to God. No one is allowed to take any plunder after the battle. Instead, everything is destroyed.

• From Reading Biblical Literature: Genesis to Revelation (2016)

  Lecture 18—Babylonian Conquest and Exile 123 yet it’s also true that the poet’s act of expressing grief may itself be a step toward healing. The content of the poetry is a raging mass of raw emotion that would fester like an infected wound if it never saw the light of day. The poetry expresses the pain in a form that begins moving through it. Finding a Way through Loss: Habakkuk ‹The book of Habakkuk takes up the issue of what it means to live in the face of unanswered questions. Habakkuk was written in the years just before the fall of Jerusalem, at a time when the country was plagued by internal social problems and corrupt leadership, even as the external threat of the Babylonian invasion was intensifying. ‹The opening chapter of Habakkuk is a dialogue between the prophet and God. In verses 2 to 4, the prophet begins the dialogue by sounding the alarm about the corruption and lawlessness that are rampant in society. And he makes clear that God’s apparent indifference to it all is a major part of the problem. ‹In an attempt to wake up the sleeping deity, the prophet waves the daily news under God’s nose. He points his finger at all the reports of destruction and violence, conflict and factionalism. It is astounding that God seems oblivious to it all. ‹In verses 5 to 11, God tells Habakkuk that he plans to bring in the Babylonian army to deal with all the corruption in Jerusalem. Yet to the prophet, this only makes matters worse. What is especially incomprehensible is that in this part of the dialogue, God points out how brutally well-suited the Babylonians are for the task of destruction. ‹In verses 12 to 17, the prophet protests that bringing the Babylonians against Jerusalem violates God’s own principles. As the deity, God is not supposed to look on in silence while the wicked swallow up those who are more righteous than they are. ‹At the beginning of chapter 2, Habakkuk compares himself to a guard who climbs up into a watchtower on a city wall. From that position, he waits to see

• From The Bible: A Biography (2007)

  So the arrival of significant numbers of gentile converts in their congregations put the leaders of the Jesus sect in a quandary. Nobody seems to have felt that gentiles should be excluded, but there was considerable disagreement about the terms on which they could be admitted. Some believed that gentile Christians should convert to Judaism, take on the Torah and face the dangerous ordeal of circumcision, but others felt that, since the present world order was passing away, conversion was unnecessary. The debate became heated but eventually it was agreed that those gentiles who accepted Jesus as messiah need not convert to Judaism. They must simply shun idolatry and follow a modified version of the dietary rules. 22 But instead of seeing these gentile converts as problematic, some enthusiasts were actually seeking them out and undertaking ambitious missions to the gentile world. Peter, one of the Twelve, had made converts in the Roman garrison town of Caesarea; Barnabas, a Greek-speaking Jew from Cyprus, had many gentiles in his ekklesia (church) in Antioch, 23 the city where those who believed that Jesus was the christos were first given the name of ‘Christians’. 24 Somebody – we have no idea who – had even founded a church in Rome. Some of the Jerusalem congregation of Christians, especially Jesus’s brother, James, found this disconcerting. These gentiles were showing a truly impressive commitment. Many Jews regarded pagans as chronically addicted to vicious habits: 25 the fact that so many of them were able to observe the high moral standards of their Jewish sect suggested that God must be at work among them. Why was he doing this? The gentile converts were prepared to cut themselves off entirely from the cults that were basic to social life in a pagan city and found themselves in an unenviable limbo; they could eat no meat that had been sacrificed to false gods, so socializing with neighbours and relatives had become well-nigh impossible. 26 They had lost their old world and did not feel wholly welcome in the new. And yet gentile converts kept arriving. What did this mean? The Jewish Christians searched the scriptures for an answer. Like the Qumran community, they developed their own pesher exegesis, scouring the Torah and the prophets for prophetic references to Jesus and gentiles in the end time. They found that while some of the prophets had predicted that goyim would be forced against their will to worship the God of Israel, others believed that they would share in Israel’s triumph and voluntarily throw away their idols. 27 So, some of the Christians decided, the presence of gentiles proved that these were indeed the last days.

• From The Decameron (1353)

  And no sooner did he catch sight of them than he called out to them, almost in tears, saying: ‘Alas, my friends, somebody’s stolen my pig.’ Bruno then went up to him, and, speaking out of the corner of his mouth, he said: ‘Fancy that! So you’ve had a bit of sense at last, have you?’ ‘Pah!’ exclaimed Calandrino. ‘I’m telling you the gospel truth.’ ‘That’s the way,’ said Bruno. ‘Go on shouting like that, so that people will think it’s really happened.’ Whereupon Calandrino began to shout even louder, saying: ‘God’s body, man, I tell you it’s been stolen, it really has.’ ‘Excellent, excellent,’ said Bruno. ‘Keep it up, give the thing plenty of voice and make yourself heard, so as to make it sound convincing.’ ‘You’ll drive me to perdition in a minute,’ said Calandrino. ‘Do I have to hang myself by the neck before I can convince you that it really has been stolen?’ ‘Get away with you!’ said Bruno. ‘How can that be, when I saw it there myself only yesterday? Are you trying to make me believe it’s flown away?’ ‘It’s gone, I tell you,’ said Calandrino. ‘Go on,’ said Bruno, ‘you’re joking.’ ‘I swear to you I’m telling the truth,’ said Calandrino. ‘What am I to do now? I can’t go back home without the pig. My wife will never believe me, but even if she does, she’ll make my life a misery for the next twelve months.’ ‘Upon my soul,’ said Bruno, ‘it’s a serious business, if you’re speaking the truth. But as you know, Calandrino, I was telling you only yesterday that you ought to say this. I wouldn’t like to think that you were fooling your wife and us too at the same time.’ Calandrino protested loudly, saying: ‘Ah! why are you so intent on driving me to despair and provoking me to curse God and all the Saints in Heaven? I tell you the pig was stolen from me during the night.’ ‘If that’s the case,’ said Buffalmacco, ‘we’ll have to see if we can find some way of getting it back.’ ‘How are we to do that?’ asked Calandrino. So Buffalmacco said: ‘Whoever took your pig, we can be quite sure that he didn’t come all the way from India to do it. It must have been one of your neighbours. So all you have to do is to bring them all together so that I can give them the bread and cheese test, 1 and we’ll soon see who’s got it.’ ‘Oh, yes,’ said Bruno, ‘your bread and cheese will work miracles, I’m sure, on some of the fine folk who live around here. It’s quite obvious that one of them has the pig. They’d guess what we were up to, and stay away.’ ‘What’s to be done, then?’ asked Buffalmacco.

• From The Bible: A Biography (2007)

  CHAPTER 3 GospelWe have no idea what Christianity would have been like if the Romans had not destroyed the temple. Its loss reverberates throughout the scriptures that comprise the New Testament, many of which were written in response to this tragedy.1 During the Late Second Temple period, the Jesus movement had been just one of a multitude of fiercely competing sects. It had some unusual features, but, like several of the other groups, the first Christians regarded themselves as the true Israel, and had no intention of breaking away from Judaism. Even though we have little first-hand knowledge, we can make an educated guess about the history of the group during the forty years that had elapsed since Jesus was executed by Pontius Pilate. Jesus himself remains an enigma. There have been interesting attempts to uncover the figure of the ‘historical’ Jesus, a project that has become something of a scholarly industry. But the fact remains that the only Jesus we really know is the Jesus described in the New Testament, which was not interested in scientifically objective history. There are no other contemporary accounts of his mission and death. We cannot even be certain why he was crucified. The gospel accounts indicate that he was thought to be the king of the Jews. He was said to have predicted the imminent arrival of the kingdom of heaven, but also made it clear that it was not of this world. In the literature of the Late Second Temple period, there had been hints that a few people were expecting a righteous king of the House of David to establish an eternal kingdom, and this idea seems to have become more popular during the tense years leading up to the war. Josephus, Tacitus and Suetonius all note the importance of revolutionary religiosity, both before and after the rebellion.2 There was now keen expectation in some circles of a meshiah (in Greek, christos), an ‘anointed’ king of the House of David, who would redeem Israel. We do not know whether Jesus claimed to be this messiah – the gospels are ambiguous on this point.3 Other people rather than Jesus himself may have made this claim on his behalf.4 But after his death some of his followers had seen him in visions that convinced them that he had been raised from the tomb – an event that heralded the general resurrection of all the righteous when God would inaugurate his rule on earth.5

• From Bastard Out of Carolina (1992)

  “The boy don’t act like a Boatwright,” was the way Uncle Earle put it. “Don’t seem to have a temper in him at all. And he’s got a right strange sense of humor. Don’t know what’s serious.” But I loved Butch the best of all my cousins. I could talk to Butch, ask him things, and most of the time he’d purse his lips, squint, and drawl me an answer that was sure to be trustworthy—that is, if he wasn’t in one of his teasing funny moods. Sometimes his answers would sound strange if plausible, and it wasn’t till much later that I’d figure the joke in what he’d said. So when Butch said, “Colored, oh yes, we got colored,” I wasn’t sure if he was kidding or not. He pushed his white-blond hair back behind his ears and squinted and grinned right into my face. “Boatwrights got everything—all colors, all types, all persuasions. But the thing is”—he sucked his lower lip up between his teeth and looked around to make sure we were alone—“Boatwright women got caustic pussy. Kills off or messes up everything goes in or out their legs, except purebred Boatwright babies and rock-hard Boatwright men. And even with us, it burns off anything looks the least bit unusual, polishes babies up so they all pretty much look alike, like we been rinsed in bleach as we’re born. “ ‘Cept you, of course, all black-headed and strange.” His face became expressionless, serious, intent. “But that’s because you got a man-type part of you. Rock-hard and nasty and immune to harm. But hell, Boatwright women come out that way sometimes.” I stared at him, open-mouthed and fascinated, pretty sure he was shitting me but taken with it all anyway. His tongue slipped out between his lips, and there might have been the beginning of a grin in his eyes. “Naaaa,” I hissed at Butch. “Naaaa!” People were crazy on the subject of color, I knew, and it was true that one or two of the cousins had kinky hair and took some teasing for it, enough that everyone was a little tender about it. Except for Granny, people didn’t even want to talk about our Cherokee side. Michael Yarboro swore to me that Cherokees were niggers anyway, said Indians didn’t take care who they married like white folks did.

• From Bastard Out of Carolina (1992)

  But the thing is”—he sucked his lower lip up between his teeth and looked around to make sure we were alone—“Boatwright women got caustic pussy. Kills off or messes up everything goes in or out their legs, except purebred Boatwright babies and rock-hard Boatwright men. And even with us, it burns off anything looks the least bit unusual, polishes babies up so they all pretty much look alike, like we been rinsed in bleach as we’re born. “ ‘Cept you, of course, all black-headed and strange.” His face became expressionless, serious, intent. “But that’s because you got a man-type part of you. Rock-hard and nasty and immune to harm. But hell, Boatwright women come out that way sometimes.” I stared at him, open-mouthed and fascinated, pretty sure he was shitting me but taken with it all anyway. His tongue slipped out between his lips, and there might have been the beginning of a grin in his eyes. “Naaaa,” I hissed at Butch. “Naaaa!” People were crazy on the subject of color, I knew, and it was true that one or two of the cousins had kinky hair and took some teasing for it, enough that everyone was a little tender about it. Except for Granny, people didn’t even want to talk about our Cherokee side. Michael Yarboro swore to me that Cherokees were niggers anyway, said Indians didn’t take care who they married like white folks did. “Oh, lots of care they take,” Aunt Alma hooted. “The Yarboros been drowning girls and newborns for surely two hundred years.” Butch didn’t have to tell me about that one. The Yarboro boys were talked about worse than my uncles, and everybody knew they were all crazy. When I started school, one of the Yarboro cousins, a skinny rat-faced girl from the Methodist district, had called me a nigger after I pushed her away from the chair I’d taken for mine. She’d sworn I was as dark and wild as any child “born on the wrong side of the porch,” which I took to be another way of calling me a bastard, so I poked her in the eye. It had gotten me in trouble but persuaded her to stay away from me. I didn’t worry too much about what people thought of my temper. A reputation for quick rages wasn’t necessarily a disadvantage. It could do you some good. Daddy Glen’s reputation for a hot temper made people very careful how they talked to him. Reese’s daddy’s people lived back up in the hills above Greenville. Her grandmother had a farm off the Ashley Highway, but we rarely went there to visit. Mrs. Parsons didn’t seem to like Mama, though she was always pulling out some present for Reese and never failed to give me a nod of welcome.

• From Bastard Out of Carolina (1992)

  Christian charity, I knew, would have had me smile at Shannon but avoid her like everyone else. It wasn’t Christian charity that made me give her a seat on the bus, trade my fifth-grade picture for hers, sit at her kitchen table while her mama tried another experiment on her wispy hair—“Egg and cornmeal, that’ll do the trick. We gonna put curls in this hair, darling, or my name an’t Roseanne Pearl”—or follow her to the Bushy Creek Highway store and share the blue popsicle she bought us. My fascination with her felt more like the restlessness that made me worry the scabs on my ankles. As disgusting as it seemed, I couldn’t put away the need to scratch my ankles or hang around what Granny called “that strange and ugly child.” Other people had no such confusion about Shannon. Besides her mother and me, no one could stand her. No amount of Jesus’ grace would make her even marginally acceptable, and people had been known to suddenly lose their lunch from the sight of the clammy sheen of her skin, her skull showing bluewhite through the thin, colorless hair, and those watery pink eyes flicking back and forth, drifting in and out of focus. “Lord! But that child is ugly!” “It’s a trial, Jesus knows, a trial for her poor parents.” “They should keep her home.” “Now, honey. That’s not like you. Remember, the Lord loves a charitable heart.” “I don’t care. The Lord didn’t intend me to get nauseous in the middle of Sunday services. That child is a shock to the digestion.” [image file=image_rsrc2PS.jpg] I had the idea that because she was so ugly on the outside, it was only reasonable that Shannon would turn out to be saintlike when you got to know her. That was the way it would have been in any storybook the local ladies’ society would let me borrow. I thought of Little Women, The Bobbsey Twins, and all those novels about poor British families at Christmas. Tiny Tim, for Christ’s sake! Shannon, I was sure, would be like that. A patient and gentle soul had to be hidden behind those pale, sweaty features. She would be generous, insightful, understanding, and wise beyond her years. She would be the friend I had always needed. That she was none of these was something I could never quite accept. Once she relaxed with me, Shannon invariably told horrible stories, most of which were about the gruesome deaths of innocent children. “... And then the tractor backed up over him, cutting his body in three pieces, but nobody seen it or heard it, you see, ‘cause of the noise the thresher made. So then his mama come out with ice tea for everybody. And she put her foot down right in his little torn-open stomach. And oh Lord! don’t you know…”

• From Bastard Out of Carolina (1992)

  You’re mine now. You and Reese just keep your distance from her.” I didn’t trust Daddy Glen, didn’t believe him when he said all Granny’s stones were lies, but I never could be sure which of the things she told me were true and which she just wished were true, stories good enough to keep even if they were three-quarters false. All the Boatwrights told stories, it was one of the things we were known for, and what one cousin swore was gospel, another swore just as fiercely was an unqualified lie. Raylene was always telling people that we had a little of the tarbrush on us, but the way she grinned when she said it could have meant she was lying to make somebody mad, or maybe she just talked that way because she was crazy angry to start out. “What’s it mean?” I asked Ruth’s youngest boy, Butch. “Means we got some colored people somewhere back up the line.” He grinned at me. “Means Raylene’s a pisser. She’ll say anything, and everybody knows it.” I thought about that a while, and then asked anyway. “Do we?” I watched his smile widen slowly into a smirk. Butch was just one year older than me, and I knew I could ask him anything—not like Garvey or Grey or Aunt Ruth’s other boys. They were always trying to pretend they were more grown-up than they were, and I could never tell what might start them acting weird. Butch was different—a little soft, not put together too tightly, some people said. “The boy don’t act like a Boatwright,” was the way Uncle Earle put it. “Don’t seem to have a temper in him at all. And he’s got a right strange sense of humor. Don’t know what’s serious.” But I loved Butch the best of all my cousins. I could talk to Butch, ask him things, and most of the time he’d purse his lips, squint, and drawl me an answer that was sure to be trustworthy—that is, if he wasn’t in one of his teasing funny moods. Sometimes his answers would sound strange if plausible, and it wasn’t till much later that I’d figure the joke in what he’d said. So when Butch said, “Colored, oh yes, we got colored,” I wasn’t sure if he was kidding or not. He pushed his white-blond hair back behind his ears and squinted and grinned right into my face. “Boatwrights got everything—all colors, all types, all persuasions.