My Secret Garden

desire

• at the crucial point… wrapped in our blanket, screaming with excitement… one of the men—I don't know who, and in my excitement I ca…

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• while we are fucking I'm talking on the telephone to my mother… every time she becomes suspicious, I get wild

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erotic-as-power

• I feel that I am a boy making a passive girl… that is a kind of revenge I take after years of docileness

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• brought at thirteen to be sold to an Oriental potentate… raised as a purely and perfect sexual object

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shame

• I played with myself, very inhibitedly because I didn't want him to know that I had done it very often before

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• I'd rather not see his 'parts'… he tends to parade them in front of me, even though I've asked him not to

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